Silent Thoughts

Quarter of a century

2009-04-07T23:11:00.002+08:00

I have not turned a quarter of a century yet. But someone special to me has.

25 is an age where you look forward to with so much hopes and zest when you are younger. You set yourself expectations and wish for them to be fulfilled when you reach the big 25.

So, when the time finally comes, we sit and think about all the things which we wish we will achieve when we have turned that age.

Some materialised.. Some have not. And its funny to think about all those things you wish for back when you were much much younger.

I will be turning 25 in August. And when the time comes, I'll take out the check list. Meanwhile, Im thinking of what I would want to achieve when I am 30. :)

Let it heal..................

2009-03-26T12:47:00.003+08:00

The only thing which is piling on this blog for now is dust. Tsk tsk tsk..

I am attributing my sickness to the horrible weather which has been rather unpredictable for a few weeks now. This has caused not only me, but also many others around me to fall sick, ( and of course we are all ignoring the fact that perhaps our lifestyle has been a cause too ) suffering from fever,flu, cough, sore throat and the works.

As of today, it has been 5 days since I have been coughing my lungs out. I hate phlegm.. don't you? They make you choke in the middle of the night causing a not-so-peaceful sleep. And worse, when I get into cabs, these taxi drivers go on and on about how I should be resting at home and that I should be taking sick leave when they hear me and my cough battling it out. Hahaha.. if only they knew.

But of course nothing beats losing your voice especially when you have already made appointments with people. For 3 days now, I have sounded like a croaking frog. Sexy.. haha... which reminds me of children.. My students are curious as to what had happened to my voice so when they asked, I said, "Yesterday, I ate two big frogs".

And this is followed with "Eeeeeeouuuuuu"... but nothing can beat Imin's search for the frog itself. He went into the kitchen almost immediately and opened all the doors to the fridge looking for it.

I must say, that is cute and I am evil.

And definitely, this is not exactly the best thing to blog about especially since I have not done so for eons. But then again, it would be useful for me to know how often I get sick later in the future.Just to see how pathetic I am.

Heh.

Thank You

2009-03-02T23:00:00.002+08:00

:: 28th Feb 09 ::

Im very happy...
:)

Milky Way......

2009-02-26T10:38:00.006+08:00

Other than basking under the sun,swimming in the sea and watching the sunset or sunrise, I like to watch the stars. But sadly, in Singapore, theres not much star gazing one can do. A few weeks ago, the newspaper featured an article about a place in New Zealand. In the main picture, there were, strikingly beautiful, countless of stars in the dark night background of the sky. I envy the group of 25 people who were cuddling together, watching the milky way. I really really do. Omg.

This is what I am talking about.. In Kekapo. Those are not lights... they are stars.

Later on, I came across other pictures of New Zealand.
Haiz.... I woudnt even start to describe how amazing these places look.

Anaura Bay, Gisborne.
Can u imagine being here when it is snowing?

This is to-die-for.

I am in love with New Zealand!!

To Bukom

2009-02-17T08:58:00.017+08:00

Finally, Im blogging about one of the most enjoyable moments I had with my girlfriends at errrr, Pulau Bukom. Hahaha... yes yes, you may be wondering what on earth I was doing there. ( Do I work for Shell? Nope! ) Yam's family was spending their Chinese New Year hols at the apartment chalets there and we joined in! Apparently, this place is prepared for the staff of Shell, lest they need to sleepover etc. Every now and then,we would hear Yam telling us about this yearly stay she and her family makes. Now, I know what she is talking about.

It was a short ride out from Pasir Panjang Ferry Terminal ( I think ) but my goodness, the sea was indeed rough. I was almost sea sick from the short trip. Heh, pathetic.

The day was well spent catching up and basking under the sun ( and moon ). At night, we played card games like silly girls who did not play enough during their childhood.

We just arrived... yee haaa.....

Aha, thats me,feeling so at home surrounded by water.

Yuhana and her lotion... buang masa... enjoying the view is much better.

Aiya... this Shikin... vogue la tu...

One group pic before we get ourselves wet!

Oh yes, how the smiles cover up how COLD we were. The wind was cruel, I tell you.

Nice pic... sorry Yu, you were moving, I guess.

Whats this?? Go figure!

Before we went running off to our rooms for Maghrib.

Food is always great after a swim. Yam's mum dumped so much rice on my plate but I didnt complain. The asam pedas was power la!

Trios...

We decided to tempt the lil boy with the delicacy in that bottle.
( K, for the record, it wasnt wine or anything.. simply grape juice! )

Yam + Aisha + Muah

These girls are scary! They take 'Old Maid' so seriously. Gawd.

Guess, you lost this round, Yu! Its alright, you are still a HOT old maid.

I enjoyed myself tremendously. It was great fun! Thanks a bunch to Yam and her family for inviting us over. And yes, babes, till we meet again, soon!
:)

Before you say, 'I do' ( or at least )

2009-02-13T14:38:00.003+08:00

Someone told me several years ago, " When it is your time to get married, remember; you may think it is your wedding but no, for it will be your parents',grandparents', uncles' and aunties' too. "

I just smiled.. but of course, the whole thing did not sink in until now.

Oh geee.....

Girls grow up ( or at least spending some amount of their time growing up ) thinking and fantasizing about that dream wedding of theirs ( and mostly not bothering whether there was a groom in the first place or not ). It may be on the beach, in a renowned hotel or that simple dinner with close family and friends. However, when you finally get down to discussing those details of your 'dream wedding', you'll find yourself forced to wake up from your 'dream wedding' dream and trying to make everyone else happy on your wedding.

And yes, I know... everyone goes through the same thing. Or every girl, rather.

Bliss

2009-02-11T17:21:00.003+08:00

4 years and 6 months ago, I embarked on a journey. One which will see the many of other beginnings.

:: 10th Feb 09 ::

The day could not have been more beautiful.
If only it did not have to end.
I could not stop smiling.

Wonderful stories to tell my children and grandchildren. InsyaAllah.
:)

Im lucky to have you.

Umar is 8!

2009-02-04T23:42:00.005+08:00

Umar's birthday is the only one in January amongst the students in our student care. Hence he had the limelight when we celebrated his birthday last week. He could not keep still the entire day and kept rattling about his party ( macam mana punya la besar ) to all his friends, asking them to 'turn up' for it. I mean like, where else can they be, right? Umar..umar. Haha. The thing was, we all totally forgot about his birthday, yet again since last year so we had a belated celebration for him. Sorry, Umar!

Last year, when we first started to offer our student care service, he was the very first boy who joined in. How time flies... its already his second year with us. And yes, he is the most 'senior' citizen of them all. Hah.

Check out the other body lying on the floor at the back. One of the boys refused to wake up from his nap and blatantly lied down, not bothered about what was happening. He could not care less if there was a party or not.

That horrible looking table!

For the better

2009-01-27T23:04:00.003+08:00

Gong Xi Fa Cai!

What a refreshing break I've had!
I was looking forward to this holiday like crazy.Why? Dont ask. Bottomline, I needed a break and I had it. Had a lot of catching up to do in the 'relax corner'.

Most importantly, I've had the time to calm myself down. My anxiety levels have been peaking these days. I would get stressed over the slightest issues, resulting in me developing unwelcoming mood swings. And then I would hate myself for how I was behaving. Gawd.

Am still recovering from the asthma. I cant even laugh properly these days. My laughter would get cut off as my breathing catches up with me. That is no fun at all.

Oh, have you watched Bride Wars? You should. And do so with your best friend. I did and had so much fun!

Alright, peace out!

ohhh suliani......

2009-01-22T23:31:00.003+08:00

First things first...

I received an extremely sweet sms this evening.

"Im like missing you n I duno y. Heh."

To you, girlfriend, I miss you too honey!

I think it is of great essence that we listen to our bodies and give them proper attention no matter how busy we get. Two weeks ago, I started coughing badly. As usual, I took it for granted that it would go away on its own. A week flew by, still the coughing was bad. And by last weekend, I had developed a horrible sore throat with fever and the works. At night, I could not sleep with ease. It was difficult to breathe. I admitted defeat. Finally I went to the doctor and was told that my ASTHMA is back. The doctor was actually grinning while telling me this. ( He’s our family doctor and even though I have not visited him for about 2 years, he could still remember me well. ) The last time I had it was when I was in primary school. So, yes, it was rather unwelcoming. Till today, my breathing is still catching up on me whenever I speak, especially when I speak the speed of bullets, which is what I always do. Hah.

So, ladies and gentlemen… give your bodies a break. Treat them well. Do not over stretch yourself, thinking that you are Superwoman and what not.

Ah kan, da semput.

Padan muka!

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Blood is thicker than water.
I thank my parents for everything they have given me.
Im lucky to have them.

:: One of my favourite pictures from one of my favourite moments. ::

Animal Sighting

2009-01-17T07:51:00.011+08:00

Not wanting to be late, I left the house together with my dad at 6 am and had him sent me halfway through my journey.. resulting in me reaching the centre early.. as early as 2 hours before the rest of the teachers start pouring in. Its our open house today! Im all dressed in the green uniform looking like some minah benut ( wearing a polo t with black long sleeves underneath ) Well, anyway, since I am way way early... here I am... blogging. A rare treat. Ok, so perhaps I should talk about the trip to the zoo a couple of weeks ago. Oh, how things have changed. The zoo is no longer as I remember it to be.. There were plenty of new attractions, including the White Tiger which everyone wants to see. Ek! And there is this new playground with water and flying foxes etc for children. Jgn cakap children je, I pun excited you! Hahaha.

According to them, the elephants can fly..
Jangan bedek.

Ehem... this is my favourite boy.
Some of you may have heard endless tales about him.

Umar, get down!

Siti was excited to try it out.
Ok, here you go!

But apparently she had some problems as she was stuck halfway and needed some assistance. Ahakz!

Merry-go-round?
Siti and me made the whole thing heavy for it to spin around by itself, the way it was meant to be.

Lunch time! Lunch time!

before I go to sleep

2009-01-11T22:47:00.005+08:00

This was one weekend which I had been looking forward to. I just cant describe with words how hectic and busy the whole week has been. And most importantly, how drained I was. At some moments, I didnt like what or who I was becoming.. too absorbed.

I could not wait to watch Red Cliff 2. It wasnt a disappointment. But definitely, part 1 was better, as I enjoyed watching the characters developed. John Woo did a great job for both movies. I love both of them.

Today, I spent the day with my girlfriend.. I guess I do not even have to spell out her name ha... Hahahaha... Anyway, it was another saviour. Having her there, talking to her, eating with her, shopping with her. One of the priceless things which I would never ever trade off is my friendship with her which has grown over mountains over these years.. Or should I say, a decade. Haha. I love you, girlfriend! Btw, she said something to me about how my entire year is going to be like and even though I told her to shut up as I didnt like the sound of it, I know she is right. I guess its always better to be prepared.

When you are wrapped up with pressure, it just takes you a moment to think about what and who you are thankful to have in your life. And as for me, I have a lot to be thankful for.

For that, I am grateful.

Oh, its already 2009 ha?

2009-01-08T22:31:00.004+08:00

Happy 2009 to myself.

So, how has the new year been for me?

So much so for hoping that things will be less hectic once the year starts. I wish. Its barely 11 pm and Im already dead tired. On days like today, I start work as early as 7 am, meaning by 5+ in the morning, Im out of the house... and sometimes I end pretty late and I'd just take a cab home which is becoming another bad habit of mine. Hah.

Well, 2008 had been a cool and steady year for me. I started off the year with NO RESOLUTIONS because I can never keep them. Instead, I started it off with a focus; which was to get my life back on track after the ordeal of 2007. And Alhamdullillah... things went pretty well. Of course, I wont say that it was a walk in the park but seeing at what I have now.. Im good. :) I omitted every single negative vibe of my life, distancing myself away from unnecessary distractions. Sometimes, they come in forms of human beings.

And this year... I started it off with another focus... coupled with big dreamy dreams. Its barely a few weeks and the stress Im feeling is rather overwhelming but Im managing. My mum has been a great pillar of support. Heart her.

Oh yes, want to know how I ended my 2008? With super-yummy-licious crabs across the causeway at Senibong. Finally, I get to dine there after knowing about it from a food blog like years ago. Ooooo la la... Im drooling already.

Mezza Darling... when, again?

Its countdown to the New Year!

2008-12-25T18:29:00.021+08:00

HO HO HO
Its Christmas!

First and foremost, congratulations to my girlfriend, Jazzebelle on her engagement!

I wish you and Fir all the best, Dearie..

Isnt she gorgeous?

Awwwww.....

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MARINA BARRAGE
So, they say the latest icon in town is the Marina Barrage. We decided to check it out and celebrated Syida's birthday as well. What a blast! :)

Rushing dinner before the rain comes!

Pimp House?

I like the scenery...

Bestie and me.

Her special moment...
Doesnt she look like an angel? :)

Now, where did those bubbles come from?

Waiting for aliens...
tunggu la korang lama lama.

Syida started to show symptoms of Crankiness!

OK, we know you are strong babe!

With the fountains...

Suliani = Badang!

Check out the clouds and the skyline..

Finally, we got a proper resting place. Geee....

Ala....manja nyee.....

Ok, back to the car!
::The end::

FaceBook is Boooo!

2008-12-21T21:13:00.003+08:00

I hate Facebook.
All those applications and what nots.. hundreds in my profile which I have not even looked at.
Simply a waste of time. Sorry girls, I know tonnes of you are pro-Facebook... but whatever. Hahah.

Well anyway, Mezzie mentioned sth to me about Salina tagging us all with super ancient photos back from secondary school times. I just laughed it off. Today, I logged on to Facebook and caught a glimpse of the photos which she tagged and OMG.....

Salina, what on earth were you thinking?

***Rolling eyes***

Being one of her close friends, all the pictures had me in them. So not cool!

Since the whole wide world has seen the pictures, seeing that there were a lot of comments on the pictures, it wudnt hurt having this one here. Hahaha..

Our DIY Oceanic Classroom
That board was my pride and glory,not! ; 3rd year consecutively as the Housekeeper.

Spot me; in my super GEMILANG KENTAL days.
oh, but i love my specs.
and hey Mezzie!! isnt that kebaya mine?

to comprehend

2008-12-16T14:37:00.003+08:00

As they are on my mind.......

A couple of weeks ago, I caught the movie Muallaf and I loved it. I am captivated with the 2 main characters' hunger for knowledge for religion, regardless whether it was Islam or not. And I still cant figure it out why the show has raised so much controversy in Malaysia. Whatever was portrayed was merely the truth of life.. I guess sometimes, we dont really like seeing the ugly side of things up front even when we are the very ones doing them.

Trust; is that most important thing in life. If I am not able to trust someone, I'll simply bid you my farewell. Without trust, there can be nothing else.

Principles; if you dont have any in life, you are no different from an animal.

Children; I like being around them. The innocence they hold is priceless. They always remind me that at the end of the day, you can still hope. Hope for things to get better. Thats how they do it. Every single day is a brand new day.

Blues; I want to be by the beach now. I want to enjoy the cool sea breeze and feel the sand on my feet. I want to look up and be mesmerized by the sky.

Happy Bday Bapak!

2008-12-14T09:34:00.004+08:00

Bapak celebrated his 51st birthday on the 3rd of December 08. The Ihsan boys spent the night for the celebration.... and then we played Uno with Imin... who doesnt believe in losing. He tossed all his cards when he knew that he was going to lose in one of the games. Ish ish ish... Anyway, why must birthday cakes ALWAYS be chocolate? Haizzzzzzzz...............

Makan Angin

2008-12-14T08:07:00.004+08:00

It was a long ride (duh) to Cameron Highlands. And gosh, you cannot imagine how cold it got in the bus. I could not even sleep and was shivering away. The only time I felt comfortable enough sleeping was when we were at the foot of Cameron Highlands and were stopping for subuh prayers and breakfast. Only then, did I get a few winks in the bus. After which, we went down, had breakfast and prepped ourselves up in the toilet. Yep, no morning shower. Not to worry, we were all still smelling good. Haha... Once the bus started to move off and take on the mountain, I was all fresh and excited to reach the top. But goodness, it took us another 2 hours before we finally reached. Along the way, we saw some 'orang asli' who I think are already modernised since they attend schools etc. The roads were curvy and steep. Its kind of scary looking down. I prefer just looking at the other mountains around. We stopped at Lata Iskandar where there was a waterfall. It was really soothing. The water... I really like it. :)

When we finally reached the top, we found that the weather was not really cold as expected it to be. Probably all those people who have been telling me, " Sejuk tau! Pakai baju tebal2 ! " were either exaggerating or global warming has really affected the weather conditions. We stopped at the tea,honey and strawberry farm.. I delighted and stuffed myself silly with lots of stawberry associated food! Its not always, you know! I was in heavens. My favourite was the strawberry ice blended.. Yummy!!! It rained slightly later in the afternoon and it was quite chaotic waiting for the bus to fetch us since we did not know where it was and the roads were really narrow. These bus drivers have to be experienced in driving there or else.. urm... safety not assured. Hah. At night, we went over to the pasar malam which was, hey, not bad! It was like another Petaling Street without the crowd and fierce sellers. And of course, the food sold were all lining up and its was not enough to just let our eyes do the feasting. We've got to get some for the tummy too! :) Back in the room, as I was packing up, I was sighing away when I realised that I have already bought plenty of things and they were occupying quite some space! Urgh. Belum turun Kl oi......

The rooms in the hotel did not have any air conditioning ( although Mezza did say sth about some cold air coming from the washroom ). My sister actually called up the front desk to ask them how she could adjust the temperature of the room since there wasnt any remote control for the air con. The reply was, " There is no air-con, Ma'am. Its the weather." Heh... Well, anyway, my favourite part was waking up in the morning knowing that it was going to be another day of fun fun and fun! I spent most of the time in bus to KL, sleeping whilst Mezza was busy clearing up my files in the mobile phone. She was apparently annoyed that everything in there was in such a mess and took the initiative to clean it up for me. " Tak tau nak tidy up yr files ke? Apasal your songs, your pictures and videos all in one file? " Bla bla bla ... she was going on and on while I slipped into Dream Land. And of course, when we were in KL, there's nothing much to do but SHOP! Oooohhhh... :) With pleasure, we attacked Sungei Wang ( or is it Wong? ) and Petaling Street. Heheheeeeee... One mistake though... we did not buy any food for ourselves and Mezza and me had trouble sleeping because we were hungry!

I woke up on Monday morning knowing that the trip would be ending soon. That was a horrible feeling. Mezza said my face looked like crap. Hahah... Time flew so quickly...We checked out of the hotel after breakfast and stopped by the chocolate and keropok factory and at around 7 pm, were already at Singapore checkpoint. Urm, over there something really hilarious happened with me but Im gonna skip that. I cant believe how confident I am sometimes. Tu nama dia confident ye-ye je. Dad picked us up at night and we went to have dinner and then it was back to our homes.

I feel like planning for my next trip already. Hehehe.... ;)

Sometimes

2008-12-11T22:58:00.002+08:00

Sometimes, life can be pretty absurd. The events that take place around me leave me spinning, always. And often, I take a step back just to watch and observe.

I like doing that.

And sometimes, I feel that when we are all caught in a hectic situation ( which is usually subjective ), we tend to lose our sense of logic and do unbelievable things.

Humans have a very bad habit of making mountains out of molehills. Dun you deny it! This includes you and me. We are all the same. We always think that only our opinions matter. Not!

Sometimes, life gets unpredictable and unexpected things happen. We may be caught off guard and not know how to react. That is very common.

Sometimes, I stop and think. I hate it when people make judgements without knowing anything at all. But Im good at ignoring them. And I think as each day passes by, I am getting better. Im also good in eating my problems up. No, not literally. But simply taking in everything without a word to other people.

I turn on a deaf ear.

I have no idea whatsoever or what on earth I am babbling about as there is nothing specific which I am discussing here. There are just so many things which are on my mind now that everything is getting to be a giant ball in my head. Like a cotton candy. Only, it is not that sweet.

I wish myself all the best.

My mini holiday!

2008-12-02T12:24:00.004+08:00

A brief peek. :)

What I remember :

Mezzie sleeping like a log almost the ENTIRE time we were on the bus. She always has problems sleeping when traveling so she was herself stunned that she spent a lot of time Zzzzzzzzzzzzz. Me pun terkejut. Like one moment, she was talking to me..and the next she was in dream land. Tak faham...* scratches head*
Eating lots and lots of stawberries and other food made up of stawberries. From ice cream to cheese cake. Yummy. I loike!!! Heheeee....
The horrendous service over at one of the food place at Cameron Highland. The girl(s) serving us were seriously and warmly asking for a slap from me. I am not sure what the problem was but for sure, she made the place lose quite a sum of money as the initial plan was to gorge tonnes of food which was replaced by a minimal order since we got put off with the service. Sabar sabar....
The stretch of food stalls at the night bazzar which was oh-my-goodness super awesome! They sold so many kinds of food. The four of us could not stop buying food to bring back to the hotel room. Mezzie and me did the closing ceremony with a purchase of their fried crabs! Alamak.... im drooling...
The crazy shopping frenzy we were in. My mum was mesmerized by the energy we had to shop non stop. Bargain sana, bargain sini... but no one can top Mezzie, she's the Gangster of Petaling St. Don't play play!

What I loved :

the peaceful and relaxed state of mind in the morning. I really enjoyed waking up in the hotel room knowing that I do not have to attend to anything stressful during the day. And of course, having the buffet breakfast. I really miss that feeling. ;(
watching the scenic mountains at Cameron. It was not as cold as we expected it to be. Nonetheless, I really like being up there and seeing the other nearby mountains up close. Its a magical beauty.

It has been a great trip filled with lots of fun and enjoyable moments. I would love for my next one to come soon. A quick get-away, though I do not know when that will be. But for sure, it will be one with lots of snorkeling. Beach.Resorts.Waves.Sunset. Awwwwww.........

Ice skating and a birthday!

2008-11-30T22:38:00.007+08:00

Since I came back from the short holiday, I've had plenty of things to attend to. Busy busy busy... I wish for the new year to come quick so that things will be a little settled down. I hope. My mum has been asking me to spare half a day to bring the boys to Bugis, apparently an agreement made by my sis and my mum but now Im the one who has to accompany them. Ok la, boys... anything for you heh.. Hahaha... So, tmr morning, we shall go to the one place the boys are so excited to go to.. I never really understood why! Most probably, they will be accompanying me back to the centre by noon as I still have to go to work.

On Thursday, we brought some of the students out for their learning trip to Kallang Ice Skating. Oh gosh, it was great fun. They were enjoying themselves so much that when it was time to leave, they didnt want to! Of course, some of them were really scared of falling and could not balance so they were hanging on to the dear teachers who couldnt really skate that well. Haha!

My darlings; Gah Ming and Dzakir.

Boys just wanna have fun!

Me and Umar..
Every time he sees me, he goes, " You cannot catch me! "
Anyway, from this pic, you can clearly see that Im about to fall!

" Fall, fall, fall, fall! "

Dengan aku skali jatuh..

Yesterday, Asyraf had a birthday celebration at his place. His parents had a doa slamat and cake cutting for him. Haiz, da besar pun dia... he's already 7 years old! The first time I met his parents, he was only 3! Anyway, this is the most imaginative boy I've known, so much so that its tough to get him to focus on things which are REAL.

I've just downloaded the pix we took at Cameron and K.L... That entry shall be reserved for another day.. And heck, I've yet to post about my own birthday!

Across the causeway, I go....

2008-11-21T13:17:00.004+08:00

It really hasn’t dawned on me yet that in less than 8 hours, I’ll be on my way to Cameron Highlands. The holiday mood hasn’t kicked in yet. Simply because there is plenty of work I have to complete before this weekend. Furthermore, something happened to one of my students which made me wrinkled with stress the entire night. Thank goodness, the nightmare's over. Someone close to me said, “Trust me..You will only feel the holiday mood and relax once you are nearing your destination. Otherwise, you’ll still be in work mode”. Maybe that is true. After all, I have been pushing away plans of holidays because I could not get away for about 3 years now.

So the next few days will be spent with my beloved mother, sister and Mezzie ( we adopted her for the weekend ). Hahaha. I can sense there will be a lot of shopping done. Hmmm… but maybe not… There’s a recession right? We’ll see…

One thing’s for sure, I cant wait to get COOOOLLLLLDDDDDD…. And another thing's for sure...Im gonna have a good time away!!! Yuhooo.....

Ok, back to work now and have a magical weekend,y’all!

i am me

2008-11-16T20:28:00.002+08:00

If everyone else in the world does not agree with you, do you back down and relent or do you stick to your beliefs?
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I am disappointed with myself. I took the easy way out instead of staying true to myself. I guess I am not that strong after all. I did what was convenient instead of what I had to.

So, I deserve the scolding I received from my mother. In fact, I think I needed it. As usual, she will wake me up and bring me to my senses. That even if everyone else disagrees, you do what you have to do and you carry out your responsibilities.

I am a pathetic little cow. Hah.

Smarties getting trophies

2008-11-14T00:11:00.002+08:00

Pic-napped from my aunt. Boys are waiting to receive their trophies. Look at Ilman... as always, hes got THE attitude. 'See what see?'

Chek Jawa

2008-11-11T23:15:00.004+08:00

Over at Pulau Ubin, there is a spot called 'Chek Jawa'. Have you been there? Its gorgeous. You are not allowed to cycle in the area so your little legs have to do all the walking but no matter how tired you are, I can assure you that it is worth it for the sight is breathtaking. Especially, if you come during low tide, there are so many interesting things and animals which you can see. More importantly, the place is utterly peaceful. There's the visitor house facing the sea which will welcome you in and there is that beautiful scene which you will take in when you go on the Boardwalk, which is a walk above water.

I've brought students there several times and I must say that Im never bored of the place. This Friday, Im gonna be there again and I cant wait!

On the bumboat back to Changi with the loudest group of students I have ever had.

tick tock tick tock

2008-11-11T01:04:00.009+08:00

As of now, I am craving for 'Ikan Millenium'.. gawd... how much I love that dish! And so far, those who have been with me to savour it have had the unfortunate opportunity of watching me wiping out the entire plate ( and even off theirs ) to make sure that I fully delight myself in the goodness of the fish. Part by part-bone by bone. I cant stop! If you wanna know what on earth Im talking about, proceed to Surabaya Restro @ Far East Plaza and bring me along!! :)

Every year, since about 5 years ago, Lala will invite us over to her place for Deepavali and of course, we will willingly come with our stomachs empty. Her mum's cooking is superb! This year, Kin and me went to fill our tummies up whilst visiting our dear friend ( whom I've not seen for ages ). Lala's mother has a habit of commenting on who has put on weight when we come over but this year, I was not the doomed one. Kesian Shikin... hahahahaha. After which, we met Yam and had our all girls crazy fun. Finally, after canceling numerous meet-ups with these girls due to my hectic schedules, I met them!

::Till we meet again dearies!::

November and December come as the holiday season for many but for me, work is twice as heavy as there is a lot of 'fishing' of students' which needs to be done for the next several weeks before the new year starts. Review this, review that. Answering calls, making calls. Oh well, its all part of what I signed up for. Heh.

On the bright side, there is the weekend holiday coming up. And yes, watching Madagascar for FREE!! Yippee. Perhaps a Johor and Batam trip, and a visit to Snow World too. InsyaAllah... They say, play as hard as you work. :) Oh did I mention that I have a very convenient tan line on my face due to my assignment at Ubin and a netball game all in one week. A third of my face is fair while the remainder has turned so tanned. I cannot stand looking at that line on my face. Why is there a line in the first place? Because I wear the tudung and so the area near to my ears are covered from the sun.

I've not seen the boys for quite a while now. Those geniuses came tops in class for madrasah. Hmmm... perhaps I should get some presents.. Hmmmm....

7 more hours to go till I see my morning client, the GREAT ASYRAF, whom yesterday decided to stretch my patience.
morning everyone!

Passports pleaseee...

2008-10-31T09:25:00.021+08:00

Funny how Sundays are usually my hectic days when most people do not work. Last Sunday was no different. Shuffled between places from early morning to about 2pm for classes and by 3pm, I was at Bugis, waiting for my sister and girlfriends... because.... we were going to Johor Bahru!!!! Taufiq's invitation to his place was warmly received ( sampai budak 2 yang tak tau malu ni mintak duit raya ). Hahaha.... It was so impromptu, only the girls would understand. Enough said!

Needless to say, it was a long journey... Not advisable for those with motion sickness. My heart went out to the cab driver who was stuck with us for about 2 hours hearing us girls spouting more than often, nonsense. Hah. Anyways, part of the time we were like, "Macam ni lah, si Taufiq kluar masuk hari-hari". Hmmmmm....... tak penat ke? Yang kita 4 orang, sampai ada muntah2. Useless bums! Heee..... And of course, the day would never be perfect without... yep, you guessed it, pix-galore!!

----------------------------------------------------
@ MUTIARA RINI - JALAN UTAMA 30
(the address is still drilled into my head lest I forget it.can only depend on myself as the others are nut-cases when it comes to directions.No kidding!)

The first shot... Smile, everyone!! Padahal, semua da lapar. Hahahahahaahha!!!

Ok, masih senonoh lagi... Haiz, if I have this at home, wudnt that be nice?!

Ok, da start tunjuk tembelang...

These windows remind me of the museums. I have no idea why....

Aint we adorable... kwa kwa kwa Picture courtesy of Sakina, Taufiq's lil sis, who is amazingly gifted in taking beautiful pictures!

Spot the little limelight here... Clue : look in between Mezza and Sulina.

When someone says, "K, pose!", you stop right in your tracks and smile..
even though maybe, you were never meant to be in the picture ( like me ).
With Sakinah.. The girls went " Suruh your brother belikan camera! ".
A'right, we took a break... Had our HUGE meal. Macam2 ada... chicken rice, prawns,bee hoon, tea, cheesecake... and quoted from Mezzie,"Thanksgiving Chicken".
Da kenyang....

Mezzie and Jazzy

OK, sambung balik... da makan, ada banyak energy...
Whatever goes huh.....

Shifted from the greenery to the browns...

They make me cranky.

Taufiq said, "Tengok my kebun" His sister said, "Ibu punya la!" We said, "Lets take pictures!"

And the bald man decided to join in.... Oh, if you are wondering, we are about to jump....

Ok, taking positions for the HIGH LEAP..

And off they go!!
--------------------------------------------------
I just want to say thank you to the girls for actually making the trip down. Hahaha... Love them! And of course, thanks a million to Taufiq and his family for having us over. Esp his lil sis (yang layankan kita amik gambar banyak2)
The journey back home wasnt that long since we took the bus and wasnt caught amongst the cars in the traffic jam.
We had a mission, had to courier Jaz home by 9 pm, and we did it!!!
OK girls, Amazing Race next?

Have you seen my purse?

2008-10-25T23:07:00.003+08:00

Mungkin da takde jodoh.

Last Wednesday, I was at IMM and was about to purchase an item when I could not find my purse in my wallet. That led me into a frantic search around the mall right from the shops I went to before to the customer service desk. And how lucky I was as someone had actually found it and returned it to the customer service officer. Thank Goodness.

Today, I was at Newton having late lunch. After which, I went to Orchard and whilst I was in the ladies, I saw that somehow something was missing. Yes, it was my purse. Needless to say, I went back to Newton since that was the last place I took it out. Even created a mini commotion asking all the cleaners about it. It was like something from an investigation scene. But nope, today, luck was not on my side. I did not find it.

So there you go....I cant care less about the other cards inside my purse. But having lost my I/C and driving license is really a pain..

Oh man...whoever you are who has found my purse, just return me those two things please. I dun know why Im actually saying that out loud. Its not as if the person even knows I have a blog.

Urgh. This is sickening.

I ought to be less careless. Yes.

!H O T!

2008-10-24T01:11:00.005+08:00

I was checking my mail just a minute ago and this was in my mailbox.

Sungguh hot!

Back at home

2008-10-24T00:59:00.003+08:00

Today @ 4.30 pm when I was at the centre.

My mobile rang. It was a private number.

Me : Hello?
Ilman : Kakak, can you cut Abang Imin?
Me : Huh? Cut? Why?
Ilman : Because he closed your room's door and locked me inside.
Me : Oh.
( Imin is heard wailing from the background )
Me : But if I cut Abg Imin up, he will not be alive anymore. Wun you be sad?
Ilman : Never mind! He is so naughty.

Ok, so where's the scissors?
::Kwa kwa kwa::

my eyes are talking

2008-10-22T02:25:00.002+08:00

Two hours ago, I was mumbling to myself in total dreadfulness. I was really sleepy but at the same time, there's work which I gotta complete by tonight so with music as my companion, I typed and typed away. And now that I am done, I cant sleep and my eyes are as wide as it can be. Gawd.

I have a very bad habit. One which sees me eating in the living room while watching television. After 20 over years of attempting to refrain me from doing that, my parents have given up. So last night when they made me sit with them for dinner, just the 3 of us, I had butterflies in my stomach. Something was up. And of course, I was right. Oh definitely Im not revealing what was discussed/mentioned/said etc etc because its absolutely confidential. :) It was not an unhappy event but it left me with my heart beating as though Im running away a lion which was about to devour me.

I guess theres no avoiding it. Life; change is the only constant, isnt it? I believe He knows best and no matter what, he'll show whats best for me. ( If He doesnt, then Im dead )

This has so far been a great Syawal for me... everything is getting on as well as it can. Yes, Im still running around here and there but I enjoy the spontaneity of what Im doing. I like talking to my students at the centre and my home tuition kids( unless they are in the mood to to drive me nuts ), I like meeting more new students when I conduct workshops for schools, I like teaching these kids not only whats important academically but holistically, I like going to new places each time for new projects, and I like meeting other business partners who give me continued motivation. And most importantly, I like it that I am earning a living doing things I enjoy, which I know is not something everyone gets to have.

And trust me...insyaAllah, it wun stop here.. there is still a long way to go. Like, perhaps, a restaurant....heck yeah, that will be awesome! Hahaha.... berangan lebih...

but with no dreams, we will all be nothing. ;p

C H A N G E

2008-10-16T23:19:00.004+08:00

Will he be the next American President? No, not Superman ( although that may not be entirely impossible, what with how the world goes about these days ) but Obama...

And if Obama does become the next American President, will we see much changes around? A close friend of mine is a fat fan of him, always reading about him, buying books about him and written by him.. and not forgetting, always yakking away about him. This 'relationship' did not only begin when Obama started running for president but a couple of years ago ( which i cant remember now what made this friend of mine got awe-strickened ) so all these while, I have been hearing this and that and this and that about Obama ( sometimes, I get sent links to watch his clips! )and now that its just a couple of weeks from the BIG VOTE, I am, myself getting anxious too.

We'll see , whether this time, some people at some other place, have gotten smarter over these years...

Raya 08

2008-10-15T08:55:00.024+08:00

I enjoyed Raya this year.It was yes, tiring as per normal but it was great fun too. And how interesting it was when somehow the focus on me shifted to " Bila nak kahwin? " Haiz, am I that old? Never mind, masih ramai sepupu-pupu ku pun belum settle down, so im still excused.

Been a while since I brightened the blog up with pictures... I forgot how time consuming this can be!

Black Trios

The chosen colour ; black.
Its so not me!

With Nenek.
She was like, " Amik gambar banyak2 tapi nenek tak pernah nampak pun? "
Oh, kat dalam laptop la nek!

The cousins accidentally in black...

Oh, hes undeniably cute.. Look at that!

OK, dun get this wrong. We love Ilman just as much as we love Imin but the former just refused to get 'close and comfortable' with us for the pic.

Yellow; the other chosen colour this year.
Its still so not me!

The bee family

With Nisa and Cik Ti..

My favourite picture!!!

With kanak-kanak Krayon.

Once again, boleh matching dengan yang lain... da macam bohria one big family..

And yes, not forgetting the day I went out with my secondary school mates..
Initially, I thought I coudnt make it with them this year since I had to teach on Sunday but since they semangat wanna come over to my place, I rushed down from the centre and met them along the way. Kesian dorang, lama jugak tunggu. Sorry ye, kawan kawan!

Jazzebelle's home..
Sesat2 cari rumah dia walaupun da pernah pergi.

Same old spot over my place!

With Mezzie's mum and sis..
Wah, I can still remember that big patato ball aka bagedil!
Its HUGE...really huge.

Ok, hari da malam... so, ader kegilaan sikit...

Have you seen 'Jumping Girls in Baju Kurung?'
Now you have!
By the way, I salute you gals...those were really nice jumps caught on cam.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Iftar at home sweet home

2008-09-23T11:40:00.006+08:00

On the Thursday of the 2nd week of Ramadhan, my sis and I had some friends over for Iftar. Once again, thanks to my mum for doing most of the cooking. :) We celebrated Nad's birthday as well. I think she got a big shock when we had the surprise for her. Hah!

Its really sad that I have no idea where my card reader is. Have so many pix to upload which I cant and have to resort to 'pix-napping' again. Macih, Jaz!

Btw Syidah, you certainly like taking pictures without people knowing you are snapping one of them!

I hate sore throats. They make me feel so uneasy, put me through so much pain and make me develop a fever which will get soaring high. This happened yesterday in a span of 2 hours.

How on earth do I even talk to my students when I am voice-less?

And so, we lie....

2008-09-20T14:48:00.002+08:00

What is it about telling the truth which we fear so much?

Yesterday, I received an sms from one of my student’s parent. He was telling me that the child is not able to attend class as the grandfather is really sick in JB and they are on the way to visit him. I’d arranged for a make up class with the student and today earlier, the child came for lesson. So, I asked, “How’s your grandfather?” The child looked up and said, “I went to JB to shop. We did not see my grandfather.”

Oh ok.

So, I was thinking, whatever the reason was for telling the lie, you and me.. we are all guilty of telling white lies every now and then. And there we go all the time, expecting children to tell us nothing and nothing but the truth. “Be honest,” we say.

We tell lies when we do not want to attend a function we are invited to,
“Oh, I am not well.” or “I already have another appointment”
Why cant we simply say, “Im sorry. I do not feel like going”
Basically, the truth.

Maybe because, when we tell the truth, we fear hurting the other party’s feelings or we fear receiving a negative response from the person and we do not want to deal with that. So, we lie.

Does that make the truth ugly? Does that mean that by lying, it makes things better?

In that case, then we can say that the truth often hurts. And so, we lie.

exams blues

2008-09-19T12:04:00.002+08:00

The countdown towards final year exams has started. Parents have called asking, " Su, can we increase the frequency of tuition? " or " Teacher Su, I want my child to attend extra lessons. "

Mostly, I laugh when I hear these.. I dont blame them though for being very anxious about their child's examinations. Standards are no longer the same as they were 4-5 years ago. Its really competitive now and surely, parents do not want to feel as though they are short-changing their child if they do not enroll them in that tuition class, this tuition class.

If you have a child in primary 1 now, you'll find that other than the normal reading and writing skills which you'll have to teach your child, you will need to equip them with a deep understanding skill as well. Only in primary 1, students will have to write full compositions, with proper introductions and endings, answer inference comprehension questions, learn problem sums with 3 digit numbers and even multiplication and division. They not only have to battle reading challenging words and phrases, they have to be able to understand what it is they are required to do. Some, unfortunately, at this age, do not have that capability yet and they are seen struggling in school.

To add on, its the fasting month now. For several of my last evening classes which end at about 7 pm, I had to shake awake my younger students who were falling asleep. They were yawning away initially and then soon, their writing gets crooked or they start writing things they are not even aware of. And their eyes are dropping to a close. Cute. I cant blame them, can I? They are tired from school and feeling the additional exhaustion since they are fasting as well. I'll be like, " OK, go and wash your faces! "

At the end of the day, I strongly feel that yes, the education system in Singapore is indeed highly competitive but with strong positive support from parents, Im sure these students will do well. And at the same time too, we need to acknowledge that these children are going through tough challenges as well, as young as they are.

oh-so-sweet

2008-09-15T23:02:00.003+08:00

I'll cut to the chase.. Im feeling bloated with tonnes of sweet victory.. I received my exam results in the mailbox today. As per normal, my heart went racing and my test tightened for the next few seconds as I fumbled with the envelope,trying to open it.. And then, everything which happened within the last one year, raced through my mind. The start of my 3rd year was a real challenge.. The Tampines centre had just closed down. We were shifting back to Bukit Batok, adjusting to many changes, trying to get over the thousands of problems, financially, emotionally, mentally,you name it. I had to admit, it was really difficult trying to do both, studying and coping with whatever which was going on. But I knew, quitting was not an option. I also knew that it was not possible for me to study full time anymore and hence, I went on a crazy trail.. Self studied, gathered my own notes, rushed through notes, mainly relying on my instincts, recalling every single useful tip my lecturers ever gave me about exams and last May-June, as I went into the exam halls, I thought to myself, " Su, this is one of the craziest things you have done. Sitting for exams when you were barely in class." For the past 2 years, I was struggling with some modules even with full time lecturers around.

So, I took a deep breath, willing myself to be prepared for what I was about to see on my result slip, and I literally cried to tears, mind you, not sobbingly of course.. I was just too happy. I cleared my modules! Alhamdullillah! Even did unexpectedly well in one of them.. Oh gosh, the happiness certainly dwarfed Mount Everest. I am so proud of myself. Hehehehe. This personal victory is oh-so-sweet. All the sacrifices, they were worth it.

Blabbing su

2008-09-08T16:54:00.002+08:00

Oh wow... I miss blogging... Hah...

So, selamat berpuasa, you!

The only reason why Im blogging now is because Im home, sick. Its really odd. I have been having fever for days now.. I think, since the 3rd day of puasa. Each morning for sahur, I'll take panadols instead of food to curb my temperature and so far it worked but today, my body gave in. Theres no more energy to fight this fever.

Dont you think time really flies? Its crazy! Its September now and soon the year will be coming to an end. Oh gosh, is that good or bad?

I miss Imin and Ilman... Yesterday, Imin fasted for the entire day! Wu-hoooo.... We bought gifts for him to celebrate the occasion. Haha.

How have I been? Busy, is the word I guess. And have you heard, secondary school students are having a shorter last term this year, meaning, they will be having their exams in 2-3 weeks time. And then the psle students will be having their too. Im so so anxious and worried.. Too little time on my hands. I hope I have enough to help those students who need it.

Hey, despite me having a time-war, I cant help but feel that Im much happier this time round. I smile more, I laugh more and basically, I just enjoy being me. Yes, there's still pressure and stress, but I think I've grown to handle them well. And Im loving it! :) I used to dread what the future holds.. but now, I am looking forward to every single day in my life.

Have I mentioned that I love my mum, so so much.... She puts in so much effort into the entire family and especially so during this Ramadhan, its really heart warming.

I have no idea why Im babbling so much now.. maybe because I've not bee blogging for soo long theres so much to say but so little time...but I have to go now so yeah, goodbye and Assalamualaikum!

;)

Ibuku.....

2008-08-17T22:16:00.024+08:00

6th August 08
Mummy Dearest's Birthday Dinner

This was the night which every single one of us went oh-so-sinfully-full! It was worse than having seafood. We had dinner at Warung Lele, a place which I will highly recommend to my friends and family. The service is superb, the food is above average and the price is affordable. We ate so much especially my brother, who even had problems walking after that. We kept on ordering and continuously ordering food. :)

Ish, look at all those food just for them!

Hmmm... who looks like the older sister here? :)

Family snap snap.

Outdoor eating area.

The woman I love the MOST.

Mummy and her 2nd baby.

Posing with her presents for the day.
That Morries oven is from me and my sister. We decided to buy her that as her oven is really really old. In fact, older than my sister. But you know what my mum said? " Sayang nak buang...simpan dulu... masih boleh pakai." Ok, mummy, guess you and the oven really go a long way back!

From all her 5 children with lots and lots and lots of love.
------------------------------------------------------------

S I N G A P O R E F L Y E R

Mummy and me, the lucky August babies had a free ride on the Singapore flyer. Thanks to Cik Na who gave us the coupons. What a treat! Initially, we wanted to go at night for the supposedly night view but somehow we went there at about 6 pm and thank goodness we did so as when we were done at about 7 pm, the queue for tickets was ridiculously long! The crowd was horrendous. By the way after the ride, I was relieved we did not take it at night for there was nothing much to marvel about.

Oh, the security checks and mutiple queuing areas that they make you go through remind me of taking a plane at Singapore Airport.

Oh well, it was a nice experience but honestly, if you ask me, its not really worth the $30 you'll be paying. There is really nothing much to see and halfway through the ride, you'll have seen whatever you will be seeing so it was pretty boring. If you are into photography, yep, perhaps it will be great. As for me, it was free, so naik aje la! Hahahaa...

My 24th - the gifts

2008-08-14T00:14:00.011+08:00

Im thrilled with these year's bday gifts... Received really amazing items from friends and family..and most importantly, most of them are what I need.. Whooo-haa!

Before I go any further, I would like to, once again thank those of you who showered me with these sweet presents.. I feel like Im once again 14!
Initially I thought of posting every single item individually, but erm, thats gonna take me more time so in bundles they come..

From the family...

gonna keep that brooch from Dad for Raya, its just so ME.
cant wait to shop at Kinokuniya; thanks sista!
other than the voucher, sista got me the Aldo bag as well and been using it since then
for the first time, my bro actually chose the present himself rather than depending on my mum and hey, he got just what I wanted, a watch.
Cik Na, Cik Ti and Ihsan boys, thanks for the pouch, super striking storage tins and the lil cute leo bear.
Oh, I cant post Mummy's gift for me... its just between me and her. Hahaha... You must be wondering what on earth it is!

From the girlfriends...

Mezzie, I cant thank you enough for the $100 CapitaLand voucher. New specs coming soon!
Salina, I really love the prints on the belt you gave me.
Jazzebelle, yup, yup, that hand bag is certainly gonna be useful for me for Raya.. matched the colours Im using this year!
Ain, now thats my first brooch from Kenji, so thank you, you!
Aisha cuzzin, thats a really sweet mini accessories drawer. :)

From the workplace..

Cristina came specially to deliver the gift..awwww..schweeetss... and I've got a new organizer. Yeay! How timely! Need to change the present one. Been using it for years.
Siti, thanks a lot for the scarf and brooch. The butterfly is soooo adorable.

And to add on to my flat-shoes collections.. Welcome to the family.
Thanks again Cik Ti and Sista!

Oh, how could I forget the sweetest darling of them all....
the LG KS20
hehehehehe... and I really cannot stop grinning.
I meant to purchase it in 2 months time but hey, it came falling into my lap much much sooner!

Im still learning and exploring this little thing. As you may know, Im a bit of a technology klutz!

***Suliani Jakun***
kwa kwa kwa

I simply cannot thank each and every one of you enough.
May Allah return you your very kind thoughts!

Reached the BIG 24!

2008-08-12T20:19:00.007+08:00

So, this is my very first post since I've turned 24..

In what way(s) have I changed?
Neh, not much...
Im still me, as young as ever! :)

And gosh, what a day 9th August 08 was..
I will by no means ever forget this year's celebration..
Im so so blessed to have my beloved family and friends with me
And that surprise party??!!
Yeah, they got me.. although I did know something was up, I was still stunned by many of the things they did and especially, the people who were involved in it.
Didnt know Im surrounded by many great actors and actresses.
My dad! He made me went all blur and dazed with that phone call he made.

And girls!!! I want the pictures!!!! Send them to me!!!

As for now, here is a preview.. of what my wonderful mates did to me on my supposedly special day..

I was welcomed ( not! ) by sprays of erm... snow and pink frills.

And Mezza had her pay-back..She made me don this erm..bird-like mask. I was like, "Is this the same mask???"

I promise, there will be another entry ( a really really really long one ) on this special party for a special person by a very special group of people. :)

Tinker thoughts

2008-08-08T00:06:00.003+08:00

I have this thing about searching around, high and low for my specs only to find it perching on my head where I left it in the first place. So it happened again, when I was home just now after my shower. Went in and out of my room and the toilet several times and kinda walking without seeing much since Im rather blind without my specs. I was getting really irritated by all these searching ( I mean, when you cant see well, what exactly can you see? ) so I pulled my tower and covered my face.

And that was when...

My specs, as if trying to say, "Im right here, you fool!" went falling off my head, crashing to the floor. The sound was unmistakably loud. Its like this sharp "Ding!" I thought, "Thats it. Its broken into pieces." And I realised that all these while, I have not been having an extra pair for emergency cases. And then all the images of me having to go through the night without my specs flashed through. No reading, no watching television. Heck, I wun even be able to see the faces of my family members clearly.

But no, its not dead! My dear specs! Its not broken at all. A miracle, what with the sound and impact. Though, its a little scratched now. But whatever yeah, bottom line is, its still wearable and I was so so glad. You can literally weigh my sigh of relief.

Anyways, what in the world was I thinking not having an extra pair all these while? I always do! Maybe its time to switch back to contact lenses. But no, I dun think so. After those eye infection episodes I had a few years back, I now have a phobia of putting on lenses. Shoo, you!

I was teaching Fariz this evening. Some of you may know that this is the 4th year Im teaching him and so far, this year, his competitiveness is showing starkly. After attempting some Maths questions, he was devastated to see that he got 6 out of 8 questions wrong and so what did he do? He threw a tantrum. I mean not at me, but at himself. He got all angry and peeved, I was like, "Wo-ho.. Relax!" I find it amazing to see students react this way especially so when they are doing well in school. Last semester, he was the top student of his level and its as though, that was insatiable. Im proud of his achievements thus far but I also hope that in other ways, he is developing well too as there is more to life than excellence in academics. But hey, who am I to say that ya, when all that matters in Singapore now is education. Quality education. But all in all, I will feel that I have failed if all that my students have is academic excellence but a negative contrast in their well being, emotional and mental self. These kids nowadays, they are indeed under a lot of pressure.

Anyway... knock, knock!

Its one more day to go!

Although, Im not gonna get all excited. All im hoping for is there wont be rain so that I can watch the fireworks. :)

Oh, btw, one my girlfriends, Shikin has started her online boutique.. So do go visit it at http://dcloset-obsession.blogspot.com/

Happy Shopping!

Can I know?

2008-08-05T23:59:00.002+08:00

Its frustrating to be in the dark and not knowing anything.
Urgh..

Im Suliani. I am the type of person who needs a plan for my day. Otherwise, there will be no day.

Call me a control freak. I dun really care. Maybe I am. Wahahaha.

So this is taking a lot from me to be patient and wait.... Wait and wait and wait.
And you, yes you... Stop giving me funny funny clues.
If you're not saying, do not even mention it!
I feel like choking you at times. Really, no joke intended here.

Moooooooooooooooo..........................

2008-08-04T00:00:00.008+08:00

ohhh... how i miss these...

Gals are itching for another game... Ok, calling-calling for players, pls register yourselves.
Kita kumpulan ' Royal Rumble Netballers'. Kalau tak faham , boleh tanya lil miss giggles.

There seems to be countless plans in the making..
more sing song sessions
netball games
cycling at ubin
weee..haaaaa.....

And its a great week ahead.
I cant wait!!!
And I dont care.
This whole month is about fun fun fun.
Its my month of the year. :)

'Bila rindu, ku sebut nama mu
Bila resah, gelisah terasa..........'

Favourite Month's Here!!

2008-08-01T09:44:00.003+08:00

Its
Baby!

Im wishing myself a Magical Month!!!
Yippeeee....

SUNSHINE

2008-07-30T00:56:00.005+08:00

"Every single day
Every single hour
Every single minute
Every single second

It just keeps getting stronger"

YOU ARE MY SUNSHINE.
ALWAYS. :)

26th July 08

2008-07-27T20:35:00.003+08:00

:: MISSION ACCOMPLISHED ::

Cant thank Salina enough for tagging along with me throughout Bugis to look for my stuff. Not having any agenda of her own, she obligingly accompanied me from one shop to another looking for clothes at Parco and Bugis Market and then for stationeries at Bras Basah and then all the way to Marina Square. Not a word of complaint came from her despite me spending tonnes of time trying this and that.And girls being girls, no point refraining ourselves too much, we each bought some stuff which were never on the list. Erk!
We kept on walking and walking for almost 4 hours without any rest! The total irony was I only managed to get what I needed back at Tampines, when I was on my way home. But still, thank you Salina Baby-Doll ( she was dressed up like one yesterday :p )

So, we were all excited and looking forward to the fireworks when we heard ( from Salina's source which happened to be reliable ) that there would not be any. Awwwwwww......There were only aerial displays so we stood around the Esplanade area for quite a while watching all the jets go by entertaining ourselves. Cool! What was more entertaining was watching the other people sitting around and waiting for the fireworks to happen when there was none in the first place. Kwa kwa kwa.

Can you see the heart shape which was left behind?

I like!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Someone told me that one of my birthday presents will start from the alphabet 'F'.
Now, what can that be?
Fish?
Frogs?

Hmmmmmmmmm......

roundabout

2008-07-25T23:00:00.003+08:00

Tomorrow's one of those rare Saturdays where I am basically as free as a bird.. I was looking forward as its been quite a while since I went out with my friends. So over the last few days, I was asking and smsing my friends, if anyone of them is free to meet me.. These were what I got :

Salina : Im going out with my mum to buy some chocolate stuff for National Day Carnival at work.
Mezza : Sorri! Not free.
( I didnt bother asking Jaz since Mezza mentioned that she will be KL.. and my sister will be working this weekend )
Shikin : Aku ada Mendaki. Tak free.
Zihui : Sorry, dear.. I am teaching on Saturday.How about Sunday?

Haiz... whenever I am busy, they will ask me out. Now that I am free, none of them are... Geee... I gave up and thought I will just curl up at home watching dvds... maybe go for a massage? Heee.... But I do need to do some shopping for some stuff.. Hmm...

And lo and behold, just about 2 hours ago, Salina called... Apparently, she is free! Hahaha.... So, hey, got myself a shopping partner, or at least someone to tag along.. weheeee... and fireworks, here we come!!!! Hopefully it doesnt rain..

Have a good weekend, y'all!

Meow meow

2008-07-24T23:10:00.002+08:00

Some of you may be aware that the local malay radio stations have this 'ghostly tales' segment where callers will recount their encounters with erm... ghosts. My dad is a great fan.

Anyway, I was in a cab one night and the driver was listening to one of these segments. I was engrossed with my phone replying smses when he suddenly asked in malay, " Do you believe all these stories? " I told him, " Hmm, not all. It depends. "

Then he started telling me a story which a guy just told over the air. The guy was at Pasir Ris Beach one late night when he and his friends spotted a young woman coming out from the water. They continued to watch her and to their horror, she started climbing one of the trees as fast as a cat! " Isnt that scary? " commented the cabbie.

"Oh, tu Cat Woman, cik..."

Before I hit the bed

2008-07-20T21:22:00.007+08:00

What a whipping end to the week. Had a great netball game with the girls... Hmmm... more like rugby when I remember some bulldozer moments. Haha... Im not really sure why but compared to the last game, I got kinda really dark from today's. Which is ermm... such a downer since Im not exactly fair!

Tomorrow, Im having a workshop at Dunman High. I rarely get nervous doing workshops, at least not anymore but Im quite anxious about tmr. Firstly, I have never done a workshop on Racial Harmony and Im trying to stay awake reading some materials because Im expecting to be getting some difficult questions. Racial roots, politics etc etc.. Yawns....Secondly, these are A level students, much older than the students I usually do training with so Im hoping that my style is effective with them.. If its not, hmmm.... yeah ok, just leave it there.

Time's ticking and my BIG DAY is here soon. Yay!!!!!! More and more people are asking what I'll be doing on that day... Haiz, takde siapa2 ke yg nak tanya ape Suliani nak.. There is already a long list prepared. Hehehe.. How shameful can you get, Su! Never mind, birthdays come but once a year. Right? :) Anyways, Shikin was asking me if Im having a party.. Party? Kwa kwa kwa. At 24? Geeee... Tapi surprise party ok jugak... wahahaha...siapa nak plan kan? Which reminds me... I cant remember who but one of my galfrens ever said that its near impossible to organise a proper surprise party for me because I am a naturally irritating bugger who asks tonnes of questions all the time. That is true, I wun deny. Now I can remember all those times when my mates would be preparing stuff for my bday and I would just walk right in on them on tag them along despite them saying, " Go and follow 'her' ( another person's who is supposed to divert my attention.) and I would just ignore every single thing they said. Hah... Which now reminds me of Mezza's surprise bday we had.. Yeah, that was a breeze. She totally trusted and believed all the crap I gave her. Hehehehe.... And Jaz, no eggs... money, yes!

Recently, I received an email about cakes and the likes. Now Im craving for vanilla and strawberry cake. My friends and family think that Im weird for preferring it to chocolate. They go nuts for chocolate cake! Not me... im the vanilla and strawberry girl..oh oh, oreo too.. Now, I feel like going to Delifrance. Haha.. Suliani, suliani......

Look at all these.Hahaha.. Oh gosh!

Fish for hair growth!

2008-07-17T19:30:00.002+08:00

Introducing Nadiah, a tutor at the centre who teaches the lower primary students.
She has extremely short hair, you know the type with the curved bob, i think thats what its called.

Anyway, yesterday, she turned up with her hair long and slightly curled. It was really nice. Needless to say, she had a hair extension. I was amazed at seeing one right in front of my eyes as I had only seen them on tv.

Before her class started, 2 of her students ( Sien Ern and Ann ), 8 year-olds approached her and were nudging each other, one saying to the other, "You ask la!" " No, you ask!"

Teacher Nadiah : Yes girls? May I help?
Girls : (finally stopped nudging each other) Oh, how come your hair grew so long so quickly?
Teacher Nadiah : Hmmm... Im not sure... What do you think happened? Maybe its something I ate...
Girls : Oh, I know... I know! You ate fish! Fish will make your hair grow longer faster! Really!!!

Ok girls... who taught you that?

hey you

2008-07-15T10:02:00.002+08:00

I have not had the time to post entries these days. Mostly, I just associate the computer with more work and so when I get home, I do not even want to get near it.

But today, Im here to make a small point about something in my life. Something which people find rather intriguing. And I hope that once this is done, I can free myself from having to do any explanations regarding this matter.

If you are a friend, a family member or an acquaintance, you will see that I can just immerse myself with the surroundings and if you laugh, I'll join in on your laughter, if you cry, I'll join in on your tears. But rarely, will I open up to you and talk about ME. It goes both ways, when Im down, I will rarely tell anyone about it, preferring to keep it to myself ( to me, why do I have to bother other people ) and when Im having good times, I will still keep it to myself. Why? Because I dun see the need to gloat to others.

Basically I wun tell you much about me unless you are really really really really close to me ( which I need less than 5 fingers to do the counting ).

So it kinda gets to me when there are people who think they know what Im doing in my life but in reality know close to nothing, feel they can pass comments and judgements and hey, probably even throw in some 'advice' ( my toes are laughing ) for ME. Hmmm....

I'll just get to the point here..

I do not think that its fair for you to think that I am not working just because I am not employed by one company or another.

I do not think that its fair for you to think that what I am doing every single day does not constitute as a job just because I do not have a 'boss' overlooking me.

I do not think that its fair for you to think that whatever I am doing does not reap in any rewards or to put it bluntly; money, just because I do not flaunt what I have.

because

every single day, I work more hours than people my age do
every other day, I rack my brains trying to solve messy matters which I face
every single day, even when I do not have a 'boss' overlooking me, I keep myself disciplined because of the things and responsibilities that I have.

And if you are wondering and thinking that I will be able to get more experience with a job, may I say, I do have a job now and I have been working since the age of 16 when mostly my peers were busy enjoying their holidays and what-nots. With what I am doing now, you will be surprised by how much I have learned not only about the world but most importantly about myself.

I am running a business.. and its tough, I will not lie and no, it wun get any easier... and yes, if it is security which I am looking for, then I will go out there and send in my resumes and work for others. But I believe in myself and I have planned this route for me because I am thinking about my life 10-20 years down the road. Not just for today.

Im proud of myself that I bounced back up when I got hit and that I am trying again. And Im glad that God gave me the strength because looking at the centre and at the number of students growing each week give me a huge sense of satisfaction even when it means I have to work long hours and over the weekends.

If you genuinely care and are concerned, shower me with lots of support because that is what I need at this moment. :) And I will be thankful, really.

And well, as for these pessimists, I have learnt that they are everywhere and come in all forms.
And beware, they will always exist.

;(

2008-07-11T10:06:00.002+08:00

Im incapable of feeling much these days.
Unfortunately.

Mostly, Im disappointed. After all, it doesnt feel too good to be taken for granted.

I just hope Im imagining things. Where is the care and love when you need it?

June 2008

2008-06-27T00:02:00.005+08:00

Every Thursdays, I will religiously follow the show 'The Contender'. I remember watching snippets of it with my bro on cable tv but ever since it was aired on Channel 5, I've been following it from the 1st episode. Maybe because its rare to have an all-guys show. At times, I do wonder why on earth anyone would engage in Muay Thai, having their bodies go through the kind of pain and hurt each time they get into the ring. Gee. Its just so hmmm, brutal?

I had the opportunity to take a walk in the city tonight. Its one of my favourite things to do. Especially around Raffles-City Hall area. The night was breezy. Just perfect. Anyways, I passed through the Esplanade and along the way, I could hear the songs of the National Day Parade being played. I cant believe that it has been exactly a year since I would passionately watch the fireworks every Saturday night during the parade's rehearsals and previews. Like a small kid eager to watch the sky lighted up with blasting designs and colours.

Which brings me of course, to my birthday.. Im turning 24 this coming August. Yes, age is creeping up on me. At this phase of my life, I cant wait to see how things will turn out and what the future holds for me ( which ironically depends on what I am doing today ). Last year, by far was the worst birthday year ever. Not because I didnt have a wonderful day. In fact, I had the 'princess treatment' which sends me butterflies to the stomach till today. ( To you, love love. ) But those days and weeks leading up to it were my worst time ever. I mean that. I guess only God knows how stressful and maddening it was for me. To date, I dont think I have ever cried as much before in my entire life than in that whole month. All in August 2007.

Let bygones be bygones. Its not about the celebration. Those days are over. All I ask for is a peaceful and happy period of time for myself. :) Amin.

Anyway, here is a tip to win badminton matches especially if you have not played for eons; have the shuttlecock on your head before you start.

Give it a try.

what i like

2008-06-25T23:19:00.004+08:00

Whatever it was I was feeing this morning, its gone and away! Sounded so depressing, I cant stand it myself now.

Psssstt, I indulged in a guilty pleasure this afternoon; an impromptu foot massage at Citibella. Hehehe... I needed something to take my mind off things and as though the hands worked faster than the head, I dialed their number for an appointment. I started work late today so I managed to slip in an hour of 'me time'. It was kinda rushy to the extent that I had to 'dump' my galfren who was on msn with me. hehehehe.... But Im glad I went for it.. I have no idea if it was really the massage which worked wonders or simply the psychological conditioning which left me better and ready to go!

Now Im tempted to try other treatments. Sheeshh.

Im still adjusting to this shift. Bringing back work and stuff so that I can get more things done faster. Staying back longer than I used to. As though the centre's just next to my house. It alright heh.. everything will work out. *winks*

For what its worth, Im looking forward to tmr... Finally, I have a date. Hehehe.. with whom? Thats for me to know and for you to find out. :)

2008-06-25T09:10:00.002+08:00

I dont know what to think. Maybe I dont want to think anymore.

Sleep's not been great for the past nights. In the end, I become very tired during the day. I keep on having these funny nightmares ( which turn out to be more horrifying when I wake up ).

The days seem long and heavy.

Its monday

2008-06-23T11:18:00.004+08:00

This week is a fresh start. I am excited at the same time anxious... Back at the centre, many changes are taking place and well, most importantly, Cristina served her last day with us yesterday. Initially I thought I'll be stressed beyond belief when this day comes but somehow, Im feeling all good about this. Yes, there will be more work which will inevitably come with pressure.. but heck it, the stress will always be there. Anyways, I have been through rougher times.

I mean at the end of the day, no matter how bad things seem to be, you will still have to go through that path.. so, I thought, better now than later.

Oh yes, did I mention how pathetically disappointed I was yesterday for not getting to play the ever-waited-for netball game. Rain oh rain... No amount of 'Rain rain go away, come again another day' can stop the raindrops from falling. It was though the sky and cloud had a mission yesterday. Geee.... Never mind, there is always another day. Right gals? July 6th, here we come, though Im not gonna get all excited about it..not as much, that is. In case, just in case, it rains again. Haha..

Its time to run. Im wishing myself a great week ahead and same goes to you too!

Friends, let me count thee.

2008-06-17T22:23:00.010+08:00

'My best friend is the one who gifts me my weaknesses and shortcomings.'

(Behaarul Anwaar, vol. 74 p. 282)

-------------------------------------------------

A friend whom is close to me is going through a rough patch. One which is brought to her by the people she called 'FRIENDS'.

About 2 years ago, I asked myself whether there was something wrong with me for I saw the number of people I can call good friends declining. I even thought that probably the problem lies with me. And then a wise soul told me, " Its part of growing up. This is when you learn who are the friends who will be there for you at any time, any day and for any reason."

Yes, I agree. Although it did take some time for me to digest that. Its definitely a blow to us when people whom we trust packs that trust away for things which do not matter or worse, for reasons you may never know.

But at the end of the day, I have realised that eventually those who are your true friends will stick with you through the ups and downs. They will be there to give you support when you need it. Sadly, in truth, friends who are around you only in your moments of happiness, do exist. Essentially, its the shared opinion where that friendship is bigger than those small and petty matters which may arise, matters most. And if others are not able to see that, personally for me, its not worth my time or effort.

Anyway, the world is troubled by many other matters for cat fights to take centre stage.

To this friend in particular, do not mind what others say of you. To me, you are perfect the way you are and hey, I've known you way way longer.. Cheer up!

As for me, being in a deep hole for the past year or so has come with a blessing .I now know who are the people I can rely on and that at the end of the day, they will be there for me, through thick and thin. InsyaAllah.

Before I go, I found this online and find it interesting, so here goes....

WHO SHOULD NOT BE BEFRIENDED
Imam Baqir (a.s.) narrates from his father who said,
"O my son don't befriend five types of people:

(a) Don't befriend a liar. For a liar is like a mirage. He shows the distant as near and the near as distant. He will always deceive you and trouble you.

(b) Don't befriend a transgressor. For he will forsake you for a paltry sum and make your sins appear very alluring to you. He will make you a victim of Allah's chastisement through his petty sins and take you farther away from His obedience and satisfaction. He will make Allah's worship appear as His disobedience, and His disobedience as His worship. He will drag you along with himself in the fire of hell.

(c) Never befriend a miser. For in your time of need and distress, he will withhold his wealth from you, while he is in a position to assist you. (He values his wealth more than anything else. And to that end he is prepared to forsake even his friends)

(d) Do not befriend a fool. For (in his foolishness) he will harm you while he intends to help you. (That is why it is said, 'A shrewd enemy is better than a foolish friend')

(e) Don't befriend the one who breaks relations (with his relatives). For, such a person has been cursed in the Quran in three places. He is engrossed in his own affairs with scant regard for others. (Friendship with such a person will eventually lead the individual towards sins and disobedience of Allah)"

Lets go!

2008-06-14T23:44:00.004+08:00

Last night, Mezza, sis and me were on a conference call.. We were talking about this and that etc etc ( gals talk ) when I suddenly asked,

" Nak main netball?"

Then this followed ;
Mezza : Eh boleh ah! Bila? Bila?
Me : Jap, jap aku check kat mana boleh book court.
Sis : Can ah..
Mezza : Make it as soon as possible!

And the next few minutes were spent talking about it; unfolding details.The next morning, smses were sent looking for 'interested parties'... and taa-daa, now we have about 14 confirmed girls who are set to play! I was quite surprised by how fast everything went. Haha... Whats more astonishing, these girls are from everywhere. A friend of a friend, old schoolmates, ex colleagues, friend's siblings and the list goes on and on.. Im hoping that no one backs off at the last minute ha!

Nonetheless, I have to admit that it has been years since I have engaged myself in that sport. I loved playing it back in school and am still loving it though most probably, I'll be more like a heavy bull running around. Right, that will be a sight!

Ok, praying everything goes alright. Hope the weather cooperates, the players turn up and the court is available! Alright ladies, wait up for the confirmed details once I've done the booking on Monday! Salam everyone and good night!

dum doo dee doo dee dum!

oh, boys are strictly not allowed. at least not for the first game. :)

Blood is a powerful thing, bachem.

2008-06-13T23:14:00.003+08:00

When Cik Ti told me to prepare plenty of tissue paper when reading 'The Kite Runner', I didnt heed that advice. Furthermore, these days I've been burying myself more with non fiction. So I thought, "Its just a story."

So I couldnt exactly blame anyone when I came to the heartbreaking parts of the book and started tearing. But mind you, I had to do it discreetly.. why? Simply because my reading sessions are often carried out during the long journeys to and fro the centre. I couldnt possible cry in the midst of the evening rush hour in the train, can i? So mostly, I'll just shut the book close, take a few minutes off and continue reading.

Do note, no book or author has made me wept a tear.

"For you, a thousand times over."
How many of us can say this and mean it right from the heart?

I was close to ditching the book as I was infuriated with Amir's meek personality... I was annoyed with his cowardice.. But I guess Khaled Hosseini had the grand plan after all. And I was glad I stayed put.

Absolutely touching. Undoubtedly ingenious.

I would guess that most of you ( avid readers that is ) have read the book. But if you have not, do go ahead.

Thank you, Cik Na for lending it to me. For a fiction, it has certainly and ironically, made me look at things differently.

Hi and hello!

2008-06-12T20:37:00.012+08:00

:: 8th June 08 ::

Sunday evening was spent celebrating Arif's advanced bday.. was also an opportunity to meet up with my galfrens, whom I've not seen for quite a while.. since Vivo? So here we go...Anyways, the four of us, Salina, Jaz, sis and me met up early prior to the dinner. Then we realised that we were stuck at Bedok.. no shopping centers, no coffee houses.. so.. we went a lil bonkers... where at? Bedok Park. Im not even sure if thats what the park's called. Hehehe.. Nonetheless, we didnt mean to go all lunatic. I guess its just the trees, the leaves and the company... :)

The only decent shot... Really!

Snap Snap!

Snap snap again!

They are casting the eye of envy.
You can do that all day gals.. but u cant take it away from me!
( kalau tak faham, jgn tanya. heeee )

Ok, its off too Chai Chee Seafood Rest!
Bye bye!
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
So finally, the dinner...
yg da lapar, yg da berpeluh-peluh, yg da penat...
TUCK IN!

Us ladies..

The anticipated dinner.

Arif, the bday boy. Happy 24th! Da tua... hehe..

pssst : oh, have i mentioned that blogger's driving me nuts lately! urgh... the 'one-by-one' pic post, the cranky 'not-able-to-load / post' moments...
shd i migrate somewhere else?
hmmmmmm........

Now I see them, Now I dun

2008-06-10T22:31:00.002+08:00

Gee... I miss the boys.. their parents are back home hence no more sleep-overs.. the 10 days passed real fast!

Well, looking at it from another way, I can now continue watching my late night tv shows, use the telephone and rack my wardrobe for the next day's clothes.. things I couldnt do in my room once it hit 10 pm as Imin would have already been in bed by then. From then on, it would be total 'Shhhhhhh' unless I want my mum screaming at me. And for sure now, we can all watch other channels other than 'Disney'. No more kiddo-kings and their tv reign.

And oh yes, its back to my morning household chores since Bibik also went back with the boys. She has been the one helping my mum with the housework for the past week, relieving me from those duties. Hehe.

Imin just smsed me, "Kakak im bringing the bingo to mak house ok." Yeah, you got it, he's learnt to use the mobile phone to sms others. When his parents were away, he was the one staying in touch with them ( when he can that is as at times I wun be at home since he is using my phone ) via smses. I didnt even have to teach him anything... I just gave him my phone and ta-daa he was on his way sending out smses. Perhaps, its time for your mum to get you a handphone, Imin? :)

Yesterday morning, my mum was telling Ilman, "Yeah, Adik! Ibu and Ayah are coming back today." He looked up and replied, " Can you ask Ayah and Ibu to go back to Mecca?"

Oh well...

A find!

2008-06-08T09:31:00.004+08:00

Found this amongst the many other pix...

1) I remember buying the tie for Imin..long long long ago.
2) Look at Ilman behind and his cheeks. oh gosh! its so cute!
3) Whose hand is that caught in the pic? hmmm

Times I love..

2008-06-04T00:04:00.003+08:00

This day and your life... are God's gift to you, so give thanks and be joyful always!

True happiness consists not in the multitude of friends, but in the worth and choice.

p/s mezza : Now whenever I am at Moulana, i'll get reminded of that one thing about you. Haha

Ring Ring

2008-06-02T22:08:00.003+08:00

7 pm
Ring Ring

Me : Hello?
Imin : Kakak, can i use your computer?
Me : OK, sure... what do you want to use it for?
Imin : I want to do 'learning and counting.'
Me : Alright, ask Abg Aizad to help you. I'll be home late. Oh, you can use it for only 30 minutes ok.
Imin : Ok!

7.30 pm
Ring Ring

Me : Hello?
Aizad : Kak, dunno what happened. Your laptop 'hang' after the boys' cd was inserted.
Me : *Gulp!* Never mind, help me to shut it down first. I'll take a look at it later.

8.30 pm
Ring Ring

Me : Hello?
Imin : Kakak, what time will you be home? I did the primary 1 assessment book and I want to show you.
Me : Oh, I 'll be back around 9+.
Imin : Ok, bye.
Me : Silently thinking," What primary 1 book? I didnt get him any primary 1 book. He's not even 6 years old yet!

Then I remembered, I have a stack of assessment books from Popular in my room which I bought at the sale last week meant for the students at the centre. Gosh! Could Imin have really done some of them?

9.10 pm
Ring Ring

Me : Hello?
Imin : Kakak! Where are you? Its past 9 pm already. You are supposed to be home.
Me : Ok, ok! Im waiting for the bus now. Will reach home in 15 minutes.
Imin : Ok, I will wait for you. I want to show you what I did in the primary 1 book.
Me : Errrr, ok.
Imin : Bye!

Im thinking, " OK, guess he really did try to do the primary 1 book."

9.30 pm
Ring Ring

Me : Hello?
Imin : Kakak, why are you still not home yet?
Me : Im already at the bus stop. Walking home now. See you at home!
Imin : Oh, ok.
Me : Bye

At 9.35 pm, I reached home.. and guess what.. yes, he attempted the primary 1 book with my mum but ta-daa, the book was nowhere to be found. We were all searching for it high and low. It went missing. So, he didnt get to show me after all!

Anti-climax heh. :)

Up up and away....

2008-05-31T22:28:00.007+08:00

Right now, right this second, the Ihsan boys' parents are on their way halfway across the world. Boys are peacefully asleep now. Apparently, exhausted from the day they had.

Lots of goodbyes...lots of tears... lots of 'wasiat' making... kalau tak faham, jgn tanya.. :)

The last thing Cik Ti said to me was, "I'll be checking your blog for updates of the boys." OK, I'll try my best to keep the posts coming. Well, the very first thing I'll tell her is that Ilman threw a tantrum as he was adamant that we took the sky train ride, god knows how many times. Haha...

And oh yes, before we met up with everyone else at the Airport, I had lunch with Kak Ijan and my sista followed by some 'look-see' at the airport. Finally, I actually met up with Kak Ijan after kinda 'postponing' our meet for like months. Hehehe... Ok, meet you soon again hokay!

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Clearing the cyber dust

2008-05-31T00:35:00.006+08:00

May peace be upon you! :) Its been ages since i threw myself into the realm of the cyber space.. so i had tonnes of emails, my blog's like a piece of white elephant and i had fun reading other ppl's updates. I am not sure why but I simply had no mood to go online.. perhaps its due to the busy-dizzy period what with work etc and also my exams. But God's been great to me. I was screaming silently with joy in the exam hall earlier on when all the questions I spotted came out. I only covered 1/3 of the entire syllabus hence having able to complete the paper was a triumph for me. I thought I would be one of those people who would leave early.. haha.

Ilman darling's down with HFMD.. sighs... Imin has been sleeping over with us for almost the entire week. I miss Ilman.. He started the holidays by being sick...gee...not much fun huh.. Tmr, their parents together with Nyayi, Cik Na and Cik Li will be on their way for their Umrah trip for about 10 days, I think. 'Betul2 cubaan' for my aunt since his son became sick and then not seeing the elder one much. Anyways, talking about Umrah, it reminds me of my trip years back... I really had fond memories. InsyaAllah, one day, I'll be back again. :)

Gosh, the reason why I decided to go online now is because I am so so full that I cant sleep yet. There's nothing fun on tv hence im here. I ate too much. Being with people who love to eat certainly didnt help my eating habits at all. Now, the next time I go to the airport, I'll think of FOOD. All thanks to my sis and Mezza. And talking about Mezza, she's now becoming like my daily companion ever since she started work over at the west area. Mcm tak cukup2 jumpa pulak! She wud drop by at the centre after work, we'll have dinner and then we''ll go on the treacherous journey home together. Oh, sometimes, we do think of spending the night there instead. Haha..

:: See you boys soon...very soon..again. Without your parents! ::

:: Huahahaha... * evil laugh * ::

me updates

2008-05-24T20:41:00.003+08:00

11th May 2008

Mothers' Day was well spent visiting Nenek in the morning and then later after class to Cik Mi's place for housewarming. This year I decided to have a mini-project for all the mothers in my family and boy, I almost gave up for I was taking such a long time to finish them. By the time I was done that Saturday night, it was already 1 in the morning. Its just me, I guess. I like craft work but whether Im good at it or not is another matter altogether. =)

And this year, instead of treating my mum to lunch or dinner, we treated her to desserts. So after Cik Mi's place, we rushed to Jurong Point's Delifrance and had a dessert gala. Wuhooo...

22nd May 2008

Ilman had an advanced bday celebration yesterday.. He will turn 4 this 9th June but for some reasons, we are celebrating it earlier this year. Well, advance or not, he sure had his fair share of gifts, bday songs and bday kisses! Anyway, 4 years old?! Time files.. really. Right now, Im looking at a picture in my room showing me carrying him in the hospital room when he was born. The handsome baby. Haha... I love you Adik Junior, with or without your 'tantrum' moments. =)

TURNING COLD

2008-05-21T10:04:00.002+08:00

Firstly, just looking at my tag board after 2 days of MIA, made me laugh instantly... so the hype is SHOPPING? Hmmm..... org lain yg stress, org lain yg nak gi shopping... haha.

Anyways, I dun really know how to put this or the put the things im going thru in perspective but I always ask myself, " When will all these stop? " Im really tired of putting up this strong front, telling myself that everything will be alright. Its been a year now. Exactly 1 year... Yes, time flies.. but the hurt is still within reach and whats more, the troubles at present just make me ask myself, " How much longer can I take in all these? "

Yesterday, I felt as though a bomb was dropped on me. My gosh... Like I said, its one after another. At night, I wanted to cry myself to sleep.. but guess what? Im so sick of crying.. It doesnt help.. so I just stared into space. I've realised that I have somehow cultivated this habit, which probably is not healthy, of keeping things to myself. I thank God for giving me great friends, great family members.. who are always concerned about me...but somehow, I've never gotten to tell them how these things are really affecting me. I'll just keep it simple to a one-liner answer and move on.

We all have our 'HUMAN POWER HOUSES'.. These are the people whom we will go to for help and advice knowing that they are stronger and that they are there for you. Yesterday I asked 2 of mine..

" How do you pick yourself up when you face tough challenges in life? "

The first person answered,

" God will only test the people who are strong enough to carry. "

I know for sure I am not a quitter. So perhaps its a contract I've signed with God.. one which will put me through all these depressing and hard moments before I can get to where I want to be.

Im just waiting for that moment,no matter how long it will take me, where I can shout out, " I made it! " InsyaAllah.

not feeling it

2008-05-15T10:03:00.002+08:00

If its sth you are very passionate about and that if it becomes a part of your life, and then one day, you found out that you didnt really do as well as you should, what would you feel?

crappy.

No other way to say it... the disappointment that you feel is beyond you. You ask, what now? What could you have done better?

Yesterday, I thought by the next day and over a large amount of junk food, I'd be feeling fine.. I thought wrong. I even had a nightmare about it.. and that heavy disappointment is choking me. I know I should consider other factors which may have resulted in what I faced yesterday but I simply cannot do it because I feel greatly responsible. It doesnt matter if there were other factors contributing to it, I just cannot accept it.

I feel so crappy and so low and so blue and so gloomy and so disappointed with myself. I have never ever, really never ever felt this disappointed with myself.

Yeay!

2008-05-10T10:25:00.010+08:00

I feel like shouting out loud,"Yeay!" Finally a lazy Saturday morning for me... :)

My kids ( not my children, but my students ) had their mid year examinations and so the past couple of weeks or so have been filled with conducting extra classes, rushing through last minute revision, having prep talks for those who are struggling with their self-confidence, trying to kick out the lazy bones in them so that they'll get down to studying, meeting up with their parents and just as importantly, bearing with their," Again? Why are there no games now? This is soooo boring!" Easily said, I was the one freaking out when they are the ones having their exams. And top that up with managing my own studies. Im not going to lie, its really tough. I only thank God for giving me strength and perseverance to go through each day.. but most definitely I also thank Him for giving me the opportunity to be doing something which I am passionate about. Some of the kids have gotten their results, so far so good. Their hard work paid off and if they are happy, that makes me too!

So, my first paper was yesterday and I think it was alright given the circumstances I am in. Haha. I really ought to thank Cristina and Taufiq for enabling me to coop myself up in one of the rooms at the centre and rushing through last minute revision for myself while ensuring that the students would not distract me, as I really really get distracted easily. Those of you who are close to me,will know. Heheeee. 1 down, 3 more to go...

I remember yesterday as a buzy bee-like day with my paper in the morning and then rushing off to the centre for a parent-meeting-session and lastly teaching all the way to 9 pm. When I got home, my mum was preparing her delicacy;THE NASI LEMAK, which I gorged down ever so quickly since I was super hungry, not bothering about the fact that it was a little too late in the night to be having that sinful meal.. And then I went to watch Survivor and ten minutes before the show ended, Miss Mezzamilda Mumazat called. She had so much to talk about and as usual was feeding me with 'entertaining stories' ( this gal is really corrupting my mind ) which after she was done,mind you, she even had a CHECK-LIST, she conveniently tossed me aside wishing me good night. More like good morning since it was around 1 in the morning already! She left me with so many tales that my head was kinda ringing away as I slipped off to bed.

Last night, I was telling my mum about my meet-up with one of my student's mum. It was a really intense session which stretched to 2 and a half hours. These sessions usually leave me pondering about motherhood. I've had my fair share of watching mothers cry while talking to me about their children for all kinds of reasons. At the end of it all, I just want to say that although I may never understand it now for I am not yet a mother, I definitely understand that motherhood demands the very best of these women whether they are prepared for it or not. And to those who have been giving ( and trying to give as money issues are usually a huge hindrance ) only the best to their children along with unconditional love, I deeply respect them and have a high regard for them.

An advanced Happy Mothers' Day to all of you.

And i say.....

2008-05-06T23:24:00.004+08:00

One of the gifts of being a girl/female/woman/lady is that whenever you are stressed, you can go on that shopping trip and justify yourself by saying, "I need retail therapy." Retail therapy is indeed a sweet indulge. It gives you this personal satisfaction ( but sad to say, just shortly ) and also a channel to vent frustrations or to pop the stress bubble when you need to. Its just like taking drugs... Costs money and the thrill lasts for a short while. But of course, its legal. :) And fun and pleasurable... and as much as we tell ourselves that we should minimise this rotten habit of ours, its not that easy to resist temptations.. Self restraint is not much of a help especially with the supposedly 'SALES/DISCOUNTS/OFFERS'.. Oh well, I love being a girl.. Enough said! Been under the pressure belt lately and so I succumbed to the self-ruinous habit of mine, or should I say of all girls/females/women/ladies. Its alright yes? Once in a blue moon. Yeah, sure, tell yourself that, Su.

If you think about it, its rather intimidating to have someone know you like the back of their hands. You cant really run away by hiding your feelings because no matter what, they know what you are feeling in all the different situations .. Its like they can read your mind and I do not really like it for I find it intrusive.. and being rather simply complicated, I can say it works for me as no one can really see through me.I like that personal space I have. But today, I found myself counting my blessings for having someone who understands me undoubtedly well in my life.. At first, I hated the fact that someone could just read my thoughts without me saying much esp when I tried denying the truth. However in the end, I gave up... I mean, if you have someone who knows you inside out, there's not much running away you can do.

Nonetheless, I thank you for everything... simply everything which you have done for me. Again, I am counting my blessings. :)
Oh yes, its back to losing-weight-session as I have expanded in ways which are rather not acceptable! Im done with the food binge. Now, am I?

Never mind me

2008-05-03T11:25:00.000+08:00

The only constant is change.
If everything around you changes, if the people you love are no longer there.. will you still be able to carry on?

Will there still be meaning to life?

Simply put, if it was only you... can u make it to wherever you want to be?

Whats said is said... whats done is done. We cant turn back time.

April's Peaks

2008-04-29T11:20:00.011+08:00

To bid April farewell, I had a good month... So far so good... I'd be lying if I say that there were no problems and no hiccups... but I've come to accept that those are the norms of life.. :)

:: Highlights of April 08 ::

Event 1
Dinner @ Naked Fish

That rare treat for ourselves was a well spent night of chatting and dining..
And can you imagine, the place was called Naked Fish.. Haha...
Interesting! Food's great... I like!

------------------------------------------------------

Event 2
Evening out with beloved pals

Spent a great evening with my girlfriends @ Vivo...
Dinner @ Fiq n Olive followed by rest n relax by the bay ( more like looking at Sentosa being hacked away )
It also became a 'gifts' nite as we all exchanged gifts and souvenirs..
Salina n Jaz had more tho of coz!
Lucky you, April babies!

4 dara pingitan.. heheeee

---------------------------------------------------------------

Event 3
Paintball

The whole lot of us!

This happens to be one of my fav pix...
Why? It shows how super heroic Mezza was to the extent she was commended
by one of the referees. Erk, but her fame and glory was short lived as she became
the main target the next game.
Tak sempat amik flag, dah kena tembak bertubi-tubi..
Kwa kwa kwa.

So, this is my group getting ready.. to be shot away!
We finished 3rd.. quite pathetic. OK la, at least, we didnt come last.
Haha!

Sheesh... No more vogue looks...

Anyways, I think I was the winner of it all.. Winner of getting the least shots.. haha!
I was mainly hiding and just shooting away ( at times trying to figure out why the fire wont go off coz it got stuck! )

To sum it up, i feel like playing paintball again! Hahaha..
On the night itself, I got a mail about another paintball venue;across the causeway..
Siapa nak ikut?!
Hmmm... maybe soon.. soon...
Bang bang!

another april baby :)

2008-04-28T16:54:00.003+08:00

Lil Miss Kekek!!!

Happy B'day, dear!!! To more 'self-assumptions' and 'kekek' moments of yours!! *Hugs*

and with tis, ends the April babies season... off you all go!!!

p/s - thank you friendster for allowing me free access to ppl's photos as it makes my life a whole lot easier!

Think think

2008-04-27T12:47:00.004+08:00

You know, when it comes to ppl whom you care about, its rather tricky to talk to them about sensitive issues especially if you do not share the same sentiments about sth. For if you tell them straight in the face that you do not think what they are doing is right, naturally they will feel as though you are not on their side and somehow, they will be a strain on your relationship.

So, they say, you need to be tactful on how you convey messages and how you deliver your thoughts.

I need an Idiot's Guide on this.

Hmm.... tricky tricky....

bully

2008-04-25T12:41:00.002+08:00

The weather is as unpredictable as I am..
There's no telling how we both will be in time to come..

The kids are having their examinations and its definitely a no-fun season for both them and me. Their faces are black and their eyes wonder to those pleasures of life which are out of reach at the moment. Probably their parents too, well, at least those who have that 'i-care-about-my kids'-well-being' nature and not dump them in some place, expecting them to be the next Einstein and when they do not, they go "Why are you so useless?I've done everything for you!" Yes, you sure have, I'll say.. You have done exactly all that you should have not.

We are all bullies, all in our own ways and the older we get, the bigger a bully we become. We throw out all kinds of insults to our own children when they are not able to do their work properly. We beat and bash them up when they dun do well in school. We scold them and call them 'stupid','idiot' and lots more unbearable words when they fail their examinations.

I ask, when we take that belt or cane, when we pour out all that screams and shouts, what can those children do? Can they fight back? No, physically they are not our match. In an aid to 'discipline' them, we turn violent.

Let me say.. violence does not work. And dun blame your children when they turn abusive to you later on when they are much older. Dont go asking, ''What did I do to deserve this?"

Me, im not a parent. Im not even married.. so why am i here saying all these? Thats because its all around.. Behind those walls we are living in, every single night, these things happen. I've seen them and heard them. I hate seeing a child's self esteem lost and gone after the verbal abuse he went through right in his own home. A question was asked to a group of students " Are you all smart? " A boy raised his hand and said, "No,im not. My family tells me im stupid".

Lets stop all these bullying acts. We are no better than uncivilized beasts if we do not learn how to communicate effectively even to children.

They are after all, only children. Whatever we do and say becomes their actions and words.

Or, perhaps, we should take a moment before having children especially if we do not think we are ready. We are not raising cows, its a human life for goodness sake.

And I am making a promise to myself, next time I see something similar happening again, I will not keep my silence.

bday scream

2008-04-24T07:36:00.003+08:00

Don't know why I decided to take this pic out of the others she had at Friendster... hehe...

OK Galfriend,

Have an enjoyable year and best wishes to you!!

Muakz!!!!

Just for laughs

2008-04-20T22:40:00.011+08:00

My main motto these days is 'Be Happy'.. and so I found myself ways to satisfy that positive statement... One of them being;

Having a Make-Over for my Family members!
thing is, they didnt even know.. kekekekeke!

And lastly but certainly not the least, my personal favourite..
we-wittt!!

thanks for being such a good sport... i love you all!!

Lets get emotional

2008-04-18T10:49:00.003+08:00

Shall we?
Hmm... Whats so wrong with being emotional? After all, we are all born with the gift to be able to feel the many emotions that come from the heart.

And Im a girl... girls tend to use the heart more.. Right now, im feeling hopeful.

I am kind of tired too. Weeks of 'rush hour' has been speeding by with no mercy. If you think about it, time no longer flies.. It simple vanishes, into thin air. Im fortunate enough though, that life's been a stable balancing act so far.. and Im positive that it will get better.. even if it means I have to take a step back with 2 steps forward. I just have to keep trying and trying. And perhaps one day, I dun need to take those steps backwards eva again.

One thing for sure, I've found myself after being lost and hidden for quite a while. Hibernation season is over.

Right now, I am hoping to crack this numbness so that I can take those steps forward by leaps and bounds. I know that this time, I am Me.. with a stronger heart.

Hooligans and pies

2008-04-14T22:40:00.007+08:00

Beware! Gangster-ism has a new look!

I was on my way CCK library @ Lot 1 when I came across this really hilarious pie shop with a really creative name and marketing outlook. Yeah, you got it, its called 'Pie Kia', located at the CCK Mrt station. Since its halal, I gave the pies a try and its not bad.. Tasted better ones but with the kinda pricing they had, it was alright. Oh, the aroma of their pies were oh-so-irresistible tho.

Really cute menu board with their pies named 'Pie Kia', 'Pie Seh' and 'Toa Pie Kia'.
Which is your pick?

Couldnt resist a bite!
This is even cuter! Just check out that email address... wahahahha..

Croc-co-story

2008-04-13T20:02:00.003+08:00

Some of you may have read the article featured on The New Paper yesterday about a crocodile which was found outside a shophouse in Malacca. A real big and heavy one that is. Apparently it may have been from a nearby reservoir.I dont know why but my thoughts went straight to the boys, Imin and Ilman. What will they do if they were to see a real crocodile at the void deck ( since we dont live in shop houses and oh, nyayi's place is indeed near a reservoir! )? Hmm... I think Imin will run back to the adult he is with to make the delightful announcement about the presence of the reptile. As for Ilman, I figure, he'll not resist a touch on the croc's skin since he is into touching every single thing he lays eyes on.. Hmmm...

I have no idea why Im blogging all this.. just a thought I guess..

Surprissssssssssseeeeeeeeeeeeee

2008-04-09T01:31:00.021+08:00

Happy Birthday

to
Teacher , Mr Taufiq / Mr Policeman / Father of the centre
and whatever else you're being called!

The decor-board.

Cheeseee everyone!!

This is supposedly the candid shot and I think I kinda went overboard.
What was I thinking?!

Figure it out;
Who is bullying who here?

The bday boy and the 'oldies'.

A picture with the vain pot.
Im talking about the boy.
Really, he is!
Oh yes, he came with a hand made card which was super-sweet!

Fahmi and Daniel, the other April babies.

Claire handing her gift to Teacher Taufiq.
Awwwwww.

Boys hanging out.
All they need is food and they will do just fine!

From far left ( clockwise ) :
Dzakir; the upcoming hip-hop dancer
Syahid; the 'I-dun-care-abt-netg-else-except-food' boy
Teacher Cristina; the lady behind all the students
Teacher Alfie; ex-student turned staff
Michaela; our potential PSLE top student
Teacher Su; thats me!
Claire; the pretty lil gal. Miss her!
Afiq; the 'heavy-mouthed' lad
and lastly but certainly not the least
Miguel; Our Heartthrob. Its all about pinching his cheeks!

Mr Taufiq and his favourite boy, Umar, at times
the cause of his headaches too. :)

Teachers bullying students.
Cristina is happily sitting down and clearly Taufiq is attempting to push
a student away from the chairs.
Ish ish ish!

Im figuring out who this is! Alfie, gotcha!

And it would not have been possible for these 2!
Thank you darlings!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
It was a racket organising a surprise party with these kids but we had lots of fun! From the chaos of the preparations of blowing balloons, " Teacher, give me the pump. Let me blow up the balloon! ", to the arrangement for the mini-surprise, " No, Teacher, I dun want to hold the alphabet. I want the party popper! ", etc etc.
Gosh! Total Clutter! But really, they were all so sweet coming down to help out even tho they had no class. Wahaha... It was kinda a last min preparation so when 13 of them turned up, even I was surprised. Guess thats how much they love their teacher!

And to the bday boy, may you continue to inspire these young lives and may Allah bless you always!
Amin. :)

That rare Saturday

2008-04-09T00:47:00.003+08:00

I had a blast last Sat but instead of writing my own, I decided to copy-and-paste bestie's entry. She's spot-on on the main highlights and it's definitely funnier and better that what I'll write. And, I get to save time too! Hehehehe... thanks galfren! The ones in brown are taken from the blog..

"the impromptu IKEA excursion

it started off with an intellectual agenda - to the national library. macam paham! once we arrrived in bugis i got distracted by the growling of my tummy over at KFC and after lunch somehow my eyes fall upon the SALE board outside DIVA. went bonkers over the 'to-die-for' SALE in diva and then the eyes started to roam again and the next targetted attention was to the cinema ticketing booth opposite diva and right away the idea of catching a movie sounded appealing. so diva shopping and then popcorns & movie. while inside diva, i realised i have too many unorganised accessories at home. it is either i get them organised or to archive them into the bin. NOOO bin! so sayang.. to systematize it is. the thought sparked off the idea to get a corkboard - initially i thought suli was yakking crap about some cockboard haha.. nahh that's not her. so.. where to get corkboard? IKEA? "suli nak gi ikea?". so that was how i ended up in ikea. library? ape tuh?"

And the rest is history...

oh! and im super super delighted that Ikea now has a 'surau' and the halal food section is finally certified! wo-hooo! Tho I'll be even more delighted if their meat balls and chicken are halal. Hehehe...

Strength

2008-04-01T22:34:00.006+08:00

I was at Banquet yesterday when my friend nudged me and said, " Turn to your 7 o'clock. " So I did and I asked, "What?" Coz all I saw was a man with his family having their meal. My friend said, " Look carefully again." And after a while, I saw that the man didnt have any fingers. His arm stopped at the wrist so the whole palm area was missing. He was eating laksa.. and you can only imagine how he fed himself using the utensils just like you and me. We noticed that only 2 out of every 5 times, would he get the food into his mouth. But he didnt give up, neither did he get any help from his wife or son. He looked happy that you'd find it hard to even notice he is physically challenged in a way.

Ironic, coz there I was sitting down, lamenting on my situation, feeling all terrible and stressed up.
Im sorry, what problem do you have again, Su??

This morning, I was watching The Ellen Show. I cried.

They featured a 6 yr-old, Cody McCasland ( pic on right ), whose legs were amputated and now running marathons! Do click on tis site http://ellen.warnerbros.com/2008/01/cody_mccasland_courageous_kid.php and you'll be able to see the clip, if you havent. Its amazing how a 6 yr-old can give us such strength and shame us for thinking that its the end of the world when we are going through a rough patch. Life goes on... And you very well pick yourself up coz the world's not gonna wait around for you.

I've learnt alot over the past few days.
Thanks to the ordinary people with extra - ordinary spirits.
And I hope that you'll be enlightened just as I am. :)

2008-04-01T22:34:00.000+08:00

here

Da WeekenDddddd

2008-03-30T23:43:00.012+08:00

Boys were @ Tampines over the weekend as their parents went to "get married" ( as quoted by Imin ). So on Saturday, mum n I sent them for Madrasah and I had a panic attack when we were reaching En-Naem mosque and Imin said to me, "Kakak! This is not my mosque. My mosque is blue. Istiqamah Mosque, Kakak! Not this one." I actually thought that En-Naem was Istiqamah. I had no idea where it was. After getting some directions from my aunt, I drove back to Buangkok and from there, Imin was the one who gave me directions. " OK Kakak, turn left to Yio Chu Kang Road towards Serangoon Road. Istiqamah is there.We are reaching already. "

Ok Imin, got it! Seriously, without his help, I wudnt have been able to reach on time.

If you didnt notice it, we were all in blue. And none of us planned it that way.
Bohria!!

After their class, we went to the Airport for lunch etc etc. When we reached Terminal 3, Imin quickly grabbed a map and told me, "OK, Kakak... we are here now," pointing to a spot on the map. "Lets look for the fountain now," he continued. "Come on, Mak and Kak Ina, we have to go to basement level! The fountain is there".

And when we got to the fountain, as a sign of triumphant, he said, " Yes! We found it!"
Hahahahaha. Its like going on a treasure hunt with this boy.

In the morning, I gave Imin a pack of Gummy Bears. He opened it and ate them in the car.

Ilman : Abang, you cannot eat that! Later, Ibu will scold.
Imin : Never mind, Ibu is not here. She will not know.
Ilman : But I will tell her!
Kak Ina : We'll scotch tape Adik's mouth if he tells Ibu.

Haiz, suka hati korang la ye.....

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

My stress level has been on the high note these days and its pretty apparent from the rate and speed im eating.
The more stressed I get, the more I eat. Urgh.
Mum baked these cute little things called Crispy Chocolate Meringues and its super YUMMY!
For those of you who are fanatics for anything sweet, like me, you'll drool for this.
Its cornflakes and chocolate with egg white and sugar.
End result, its like eating cornflakes and cotton candy!
Ooooo-Lala...Heaven!
But watch out. Its high with sugar!

Mumbai's Princess is back... with souvenirs of coz! :)
Terima kasih daun keladi, lain kali buat lagi!

She was down with fever and diarrhea it seemed. Balik Mumbai trus sakit. Wahahaha. Sakit sakit pun bila suruh balik, tak nak. We sat and talked from 6 plus in the evening all the way to nearing 11pm. Like huh? But ya la, wen Su and Mezza start talking, we cant stop. The funny thing is, altho she just came from Mumbai,we talked more about other things. Esp in my stressed-up mood, I added to the non stop yakking. These days, Im in the mood of giving people *slaps*. Really, Im not joking. This stress im feeling got me running 10 rounds around the stadium. NO Kidding. Im amazed myself. After a year of not running. Yes, thats how much Im burning with pressure. Urgh. Lets just drop it. Quote and unquote from Mezza ;
" Aku susah la cari baju untuk kau. Takut kau gatal sana, gatal sini! Kain panas sikit, mesti tak boleh handle nanti".
Heheheeee.... You sure know me well.

.alluring.

2008-03-25T23:57:00.006+08:00

An afternoon of greenery and flowers.
Never fails to make me go :)

The location.

Capturing sights.
Lotsa fun.
Beauty up close.

Peek-a-Boo!

Who was born 24 yrs ago??

2008-03-18T10:10:00.003+08:00

MezzaMilda!!

18th March 08
Happy 24th Dearest Galfren!

Fers of all, can u believe it? We are turning 24, or rather you have turned 24! I think we are left with no choice but to believe it since its already happening. Haha! Its been a whale of a journey all these years. Those sweet and bitter memories of this friendship is ours to keep for life. Its my blessing to have you as a friend all these while. Someone who appreciates me for who I am and standing by with that listening ear when needed. From the netball games, the Langkawi trip back in school to those tertiary times when you laughed at me for having to don a pink uniform, and then you taking your make up course and us listening to each other about probs at home ( which being teenagers, believe me, we had tonnes. *giggles* ). And the most treasured heart-to-heart talks about life, often lasting late through the night. The list goes on and on. And Alhamdullillah, we've gone through it together.

And Im sooooo happy for you that everything is going on well with you especially at work. Go go girl!

I think one of the most puzzling thing I fathom about is how we can get SO CLOSE despite the HUGE DIFFERENCES between us. From our personalities to what we wear etc etc, everything is a complete contrast. I remember someone asking the both of us upfront, "Eh, you guys are so different, how come you're so close?". Tho I cannot remember who it was. Mezza, do you? Nonetheless, perhaps the saying "Opposites-Attract" is true.

Well, I dunno why im going all sappy here.. haha.. but its ok huh... since its her bday and all.. huahahaha..

OK, Bestie, Have a SUPER-INCREDIBLE birthday!!!!

and here's to more 'automatic' drop-off at Simei MRT and to Mr Bean for healthy snacks (ya-rite) and sitting there till the shop is almost closing. Im telling you, dun u eva move house! Even if you do, move somewhere near me!

Emil's Bday - The Who??

2008-03-17T00:49:00.004+08:00

At Pasir Ris Park on last Sat, 4 gals set out to execute a surprise bday celebration for their buddy. Clad in black and yellow, they were like Bumble Bees carrying loads of items, seeking refuge at the beach and praying hard that there will be no downpour.

Presenting to you the gals individually ( drum roll...... )

:: Cik Sal Boleh ::

she is the illegal gift inspector, goes ard opening up the birthday gal's presents
suka berbual formal ( teacher la katakan )
CAUTION ; panics easily eg : she dumped every single thing into a huge plastic bag ( sampai tonggang terbalik ) thinking that the birthday gal was coming already

:: Whitelili ::

penat layankan karenah kawan2 dia yg lain
likes to fight with the wind, bising2 sampai pekak org
Yg paling senonoh in the group ( a role model! ) tak percaya, tanya yg lain.

:: Jazze-Belo ::

part time balloon chaser at pasir ris park
doesnt know when to stop talking ; once she starts, she cant stop!
suka ketawakan diri sendiri ( very high self esteem! )

:: Lil Miss Gendut ::

suka posing dengan barang orang lain, buat macam sendirian berhad
unofficial balloon blower, nasib baik tak semput
likes to be in the middle of everything ( rimas you know! )

and the star for the day.......

:: Miss Emil ::

terharu dapat bday surprise
nak melalak tapi maintain vogue!
tak sangka kawan2 dia semangat buat ni semua untuk dia. Haha!

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Bloopers :
We forgot the essentials like candles, black markers for decor and bubbles.
Ooopps!

The initial plan :
To have 24 balloons all blown up and tied around.
In the end, we only managed half of them.
Hahaha... Berangan je lebih.

The Amazing Fact :
We did not even meet up prior to the event.
Everything was done via smses, calls and emails.
But I cant imagine if its a wedding we are planning.
Ah, the fers to go will be the guinea pig ok....

At the end of the day, what im truly happy about is even after many many years, we are still able to celebrate each other's birthday together. It doesnt take a whole clan of friends to make you happy. Only the closed ones matter. Im glad Mezza had a bee of a time. So did the rest of us including me!

So much laughter, so many memories to keep.
Good friends are family members we get to choose and keep.

Emil's Bday- The Snaps

2008-03-16T23:58:00.026+08:00

15th March
Mezza, you got punked!

Its a good start!

Evidently, im getting stressed abt getting the things ready.
And what does Jaz do? She's playing ard! Aper ni?!

They took this while hiding behind a tree to wait for Mezza to arrive.
Sempat menyempat!

Pet pet! "Surprise!!Happy Birthday!"

The birthday gal arrives....

K, it looks easy to do this rite? Trust me, NO!
It was us against the wind.

The food we had. Oh thank u Mummy for the fried rice!
Eh, whose phone? Nice!

A clear illustration of me struggling to get my tudung down, what with the strong wind.
As for mezza, no comments.

Our hard work!!

Left to right :
Muka penat, muka baru bangun, muka tak mandi pagi.

Showing off her collage from us.
Credit goes to Jaz and Salina. Oh Fir too! Haha..

My mosaic pic of her... She likes it, i like it .. we are all happy!

Hidden talent ; we are all born models.

Bumble Lady-Bees

Initially, i tot of buying her a tiara but when i saw the mask, i tot it suit her better
And yeah, she proved me right...

Whoa... jgn ketawa banyak2. Nanti malam nangis!

Heh?

Peacemakers? Ntah.. call Woodbridge pls!

The Black Beauties

Awww... so shweet..
You wun see this anytime soon again!

Jaz! Seriously, keep your feet grounded pls!

The wind was super strong so we had to hold the banner down ourselves!

Its a wrap y'all! Yahoo! The last and final shot.

Surprise!!

2008-03-16T00:45:00.004+08:00

What?
Where?
When?
Who?

Till im back for more..... :)

Free Cream Puffs for me!

2008-03-16T00:24:00.003+08:00

Night of the cream puffs
Yummy yummy
You want?
=)

The spinning mind

2008-03-12T09:05:00.004+08:00

I've always wondered how it is and what it is that makes each child or student learn the way they do.. Every single child is so unique that no one of them is the same. When you teach a class of students, you'll be able to see so many stark differences in the way your students behave that you'll start to think how do they become the way they are.. You'll find some interesting characters you wudnt know whether to laugh or cry.

The self motivators
Some of them will be sitting quietly and listening intently. They are able to complete their assignments on time and have absolutely no behavioral concerns. Even when you leave them alone, they'll automatically take out their own books to read or do practice exercises.

The dreamers
Then there are those who will be sitting quietly asking no questions making no noise disturbances.. just that, you'll be able to tell that they are lost.. they are like dreaming.. caught in their own world. And it is shown through their work.. they did not grasp anything that you were teaching.

The attention seekers
Some students love attention.. even when they are getting it for the wrong reasons. Once you attempt to teach, there'll just be sth they are up to. Be it poking their friends with their pencil, taking away others' stationeries, suddenly standing up, as if there's nothing wrong with that or one classic case, singing away in class as though he is in the shower.

The above is just a few of the many personalities you'll find in students.

I love what im doing.. But I believe being a teacher or an educator or whatever we call ourselves is not simply about laying out the facts and content to students, seeing them through examinations and then call it a year. To me its about empowering each life you come across and teaching them the right techniques to effective learning. So I find myself having to understand how the brain works and knowing how to apply skills like mind mapping and super memory. Its a journey of learning all over again for me and I love that. I also believe that if we can motivate and instill interest in students, they will on their own find means and ways to learn for the mind on its own is resourceful.

Sadly, many of them are not motivated to learn.. they are not enthusiastic in learning and this will affect their academic performance. And what do we do? Because of that, we label them.. as lazy, as a slow learner, as someone who will just be the average joe. And guess what.. they will identify with that identity and then their brain is programmed to be just that and nothing more.

It really breaks my heart when I come across students who after have done something well, will be commended by me but will not be able to take in the praise. I'll say something like, " Thats so clever of you! ". And what do they say in reply? " No, Im not... My mother/father/sister/brother/teacher said that im not."

Gee.. clearly sth went wrong somewhere.. We tend to underestimate what we say to children. The thing is, they take in every single thing we say and it forms their belief towards themselves. All it takes is positive thinking and thoughts passed to them and thats what will separate a high achiever from a i-am-not-smart-and-i-can-never-do-anything-well.

Not wealth... not advanced technology but just simple and sincere guidance from us will do.

2008-03-11T00:16:00.003+08:00

Ive never talked about this openly to anyone.. perhaps its because what happened really hit me bad to the extent that it took me months to recover and i am still recovering. it was the darkest part of my life and i can only wish that i do not have to go through all that again or for that matter it does not happen to my closed ones. what i know now is definitely i am stronger and its made me who i am now.

Months ago, my team fell apart.. a group of people whom i trusted and held dear to me, for reasons of their own ( which i do not wish to list down for seriously it doesnt matter what those reasons are ) took off and left a venture which we started together. I was devastated and i felt so betrayed it has clearly left a mark on me. At that point of time, the business wasnt doing well.. it was in huge debts and creditors were on our tails. Disagreements came about, fingers pointed here and there, decisions were made and in the end I was only left with one member. From 5, it came down to 2.. to pick up all the pieces.

What hurt the most was that i heard people talking.. " The others who left are smart! They dun want to get themselves into trouble and since the business isnt duin well, its only smart to leave."

May i ask... if everyone of us was to leave, who would be the one paying the staff and creditors? The staff need their pay. They dun work for free. Who would be the one to return the money we had borrowed in the very first place?

I only have myself to blame.. not for the downfall of that venture.. but to misjudge the character of those people whom i thought would have stuck together through thick and thin.

How was i feeling at that moment of time? i felt sick to my stomach. My team members had left and every single day, creditors were after us like loan sharks. There was a side of me which thought, I shd just pull out too and then i wouldnt have to face all these. After all, other people were saying that it would be a smart move.. But I stayed on.. why? Simple... you dun just leave when things are falling apart. I may not have the greatest leadership skills but I am not a quitter.

I cried almost every single night during that period of time.. The pressure was overwhelming. I didnt know if i could even survive. Emotionally, I was broken. Physically, I was drained. The amount of debt kept on increasing and whilst the others were moving on with their lives, there i was stuck in a rut. Of course I felt angry.. I felt that it was unfair and I felt that perhaps being irresponsible was the right thing to do. You can only imagine the amount of hatred I harbored. I became a bitter person. Skeptical and pessimistic.

I am better now. Tho I still dun understand how is it that you can just leave sth you started especially when things just dun end when you leave. It goes on. I will never understand how it is that you can live with yourself quitting something knowing that other people will have to clean up the mess. The mess which you were also a part of. I can never understand how you can just leave and not even look back as though everything never happened. Im stunned. After all even to this date, I am still cleaning up the mess. And looks like it will follow through for quite some time. And there you are once again, going on with your life perfectly fine. You can say that IM amazed.

I thought that with time, i will get those answers.. but so far, ive gotten none.

Wounds will heal but scars will remain. Im not going to judge anyone. Im just amazed by how people look at their lives and carry on having a clear conscience.